No Spoons - Tumblr Posts

love the word "indisposed" .. feeling very indisposed right now, got the sniffles and a scratchy throat, but it'll be alright <:

That moment when you run out of spoons in your room and you're absolutely NOT going to the caf because you don't have your public face on.

feeling particularly disabled today

the spoon drawer is empty

the forks are gone too

i have sporks.. kinda bad at being a fork, and kinda bad at being a spoon, but good for impaling ableism

It is 1am and I have to start getting ready for my dr appointment around 8am....

I have to wash my clothes because I only have one pair of jeans that fit me and limited shirts to choose from (not to mention undergarments) so I have to stay up to make sure they make it in the dryer before hopefully passing out before I gotta get up.

🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠

Limited sleep is gonna exacerbate my pots and I can't just skip laundry because my audhd won't let me wear just *any 'ol thing* out of the house. 🥲

I really need to go to the local thrift stores for a new wardrobe again because.... I just can't do this 'one outfit available to leave the house' thing anymore.... it's getting ridiculous... but I can't even afford thrift right now and the earliest I can probably swing it is months away in late autumn/winter... 🥲

Today was a day.

I'm still sick, with something???? Although it feels like..... I got sick... then when the sickness ended, my pots nausea and gastrointestinal issues just continued? I've spent the last couple of days utterly nauseous, dizzy, and cramped up.

I will say I'm glad I just got some dishes done. They'd sat in the sink for 3 days because I simply couldn't tend to them. Our dishwasher broke and we don't know what's wrong with it. (It's a nice one too so extra devastating, I feel like.)

We need it to get fixed soon, each day that passes I get more anxiety about dishes piling up again. Standing, even sitting, at the sink to do them hurts my body so much. My entire back/shoulders & hands cramp up, which is the biggest dissuasion from the task.

That's all I can remember from today, pretty much. Tons of feeling sick. Had a salad for lunch. Then did dishes. Suddenly it's 10pm. Where did the day go?

Our family accidentally got on a day/night schedule again and it's also probably a factor in being out of sorts. Most everyone we know is more on a 7a-7p schedule. (Give or take a couple hours) But we have been on a 12p-12a schedule for ages.

I want to blame me getting sick, but, it started before that happened. It took 2? days to swing to a random 7a-8p schedule and I hate iiiiiiit.

Honestly my ideal schedule is waking up a couple of hours before sunset, and going to bed a couple of hours after sunrise. Like a 5p-5a thing maybe? Idk... I've sat for a moment mid-type and now have lost my entire train of thought. Oh well.

I did dishes this morning again. Fed the dogs. Had a decent morning. Spontaneously passed tf out for 4? hours.... woke up in a late afternoon daze. Didn't understand what time it was. Felt more tired than before I passed out. Used a bunch of spoons to cook lunch and wash another round of dishes. Aaaaaaand I'm horizontal again. 🫠

Slept last night from maybe 10:45pm to 1am. Couldn't sleep again after that. Was horrendously exhausted during the morning. Passed out (unexpectedly again) around 11am? Partner woke me up about 5pm because he was exhausted too from picking up my slack during my mini coma. Did evening routine then simply rested consciously the whole evening. Talked to some friends in discord. Then did night routine.

Got set up on a new game I'm playing tomorrow with friends, so that's exciting. (Got my bestie to download it too so she'll meet my discord pals in chat for the first time)

It's 1am and I'm unable to get settled to sleep again. This is exhausting.

Today on Why My Toddler Is Mad At Me :

I will not let him dip his toy ladle into my cup of juice so he can have a sip.

I'm sorry sir but I do not have spoons for the aftermath of that, as much as I adore the whimsy of the concept.

Mamma is sick and barely functioning just existing.

Another day, mayhaps.

🥄🧃🥄🧃🥄🧃🥄🧃🥄🧃🥄🧃🥄

My chronically ill, always in pain ass, just got two toddlers and myself, showered. Husband helped during wiggly moments. While I'm now in physical HELL..... I still feel accomplished.

My entire back/shoulders are shot with pain. My chest is scratched up either because of the hair clip my youngest held as a distraction, or his nails I forgot to trim before the shower vs after.

Siiiigggghhhhhh

That's it. That is our/my activity of the day. There will be no more. We are relaxing the rest of the evening.

Only thing I'm not looking forward to is laying in bed. We lost most of our sheets when we moved, somehow, so we have 2 sheet sets. One has gone missing recently. The other is on the bed and currently nearing needing washed. The only sheets that don't agitate my skin are like $54 here 🫠🫠

Another thing I think a lot of people take for granted. Not having to have specific bedding that doesn't agitate their skin.