Ror Hermes - Tumblr Posts
Record of Ragnarok Incorrect Quote #4
Everyone Hates Ares
After Poseidon loses to Kojiro, a lot of the gods are acting like Lil’ Bitches angry, so Brunhilde decides to have the Human Fighters play some Baseball (With Buddha and Heracles because they’re cool) to celebrate their first victory against the gods
Ares (Comes in and wants to show that the gods are superior, even in a Sport): Hm, catcher huh?
Hercules (Looks to see Ares holding a baseball bat):
Ares: Catching, throwing, leading, fielding etc. One could call it a fitting position for my brother. But what I desire to see is Pitcher Heracles!
Heracles: Ares… You could have been the pitcher
Brunhilde: Not he will not. We have an even amount of players and I don’t want anything to do with this bitch
Ares: Promise me brother. If I hit a home run right here, next time you’ll pitc- (Is cut off with a baseball hitting him hard in the face that he falls over unconscious)
Maki!Y/N (Intentionally hits Ares in the face to shut him up):
Heracles (Holding Ares’ unconscious body): Ares! Hang in there!
Hermes (smiling): Hey, nice pitch
Shiva: Nice pitch Human!
Loki: Really, it wasn’t bad
Hades, Zeus & Aphrodite: That was a good one
Buddha, Raiden & Huang: Nice pitch Y/N-Chan!
Lu Bu & Thor: Nice pitch
Dadam, Kojiro, Tesla & Jack: Wonderful pitch
Heracles: Wow brother. Everyone really hates you. I mean everyone
Who here also likes to the idea of tormenting Ares? I like the idea of making the large man who drinks from a tiny teacup terrified a very satisfying way to finish off a Thursday…
Record of Ragnarok Incorrect Quote #9
Marriage Goals
Brunhilde summoned Wednesday Y/N, who has been a complete nightmare to the Gods, and they want to try and figure out what her ‘deal’ is… by using Ares and Aphrodite to get answers
Ares (After meeting Y/N’s family): You’re family is, very… interesting. You’re parents are so, involved with each other unlike mine
Ares (Scoots a little bit away from Y/N): Y/N, do you think that maybe, some day, you might want to get married and have kids?
Wednesday Y/N: No
Aphrodite (Shoves Ares away): But what if you met just the right man who worshipped and adored you. Who’d do anything for you, who’d be your devoted slave. Then what would you do?
Wednesday Y/N: I’d pity him
Loki and Shiva (Snort and begin to laugh their asses off):
Hermes (Trying to stifle a small laugh):
The Gods are both terrified by this Human Child and entertained by her antics… Who wants to her her Sibling-like Relationship with the Human Fighters? Along with the Gods?
Record of Ragnarok Incorrect Quote #11
Y/N and Zeus Chat
After Y/N wins over Hera, Zeus is not happy since he’s being filed for a Divorce all for a human, but wants to prove he’s… ‘nice’
Zeus (Gets a phone call and sees the contact is ‘Home Wrecker’): Hermes! It’s Y/N!
Hermes (Surprised): Answer it, I want to hear!
Zeus (Answers): Mx. Y/N, how…nice of you to call
Y/N: Hello, I really enjoyed my time last night with Hera, Zeus
Zeus: Oh…Hera told me all about it…in great detail
Y/N: …Or should I say, ‘Douche’?
Hermes (Surprised):
Y/N: Ha ha ha!
Hermes (Looks at his father and is trying not to laugh):
Zeus (Anger rising): …Yes, congratulations… you won fair and square… very impressive for a mortal
Y/N: Do you like brain teasers?
Zeus: Oh, I love brain teasers
Y/N: What does Zeus and a Black Hole have in common?
Zeus and Hermes (Looking at each other confused):
Y/N: They both suck!
Hermes (Bursts out laughing): Ha ha ha!
Zeus (Murderous look): ….
Hera is in the other room trying not to laugh
This is based off of @luxthestrange RoR Hera Quotes with Y/N, go see her stuff! And @sketchy-owl Hera artwork, check them both out!
Record of Ragnarok Incorrect Quote #22
The ‘Heartbreaking’ Truth
Eve: So, who are you interested in?
Y/N: He’s very sophisticated
Hermes (Fixes his tie):
Y/N: He has an air of elegance
Hermes (Pulls his hair back):
Y/N: He likes to play the violin
Hermes (Walks over oozing confidence):
Y/N: And he’s very charming, without even having to try
Hermes (About to sing the new song he made):
Y/N: It’s…. Malleus Draconia!
Hermes:
Hermes (Jealous): Who is this ‘Malleus Draconia’ gentleman? And where can I meet him?
Should I do a part 3?
Continuation of this:
Record of Ragnarok Incorrect Quote #30
Sacrifices
Apollo: Without Ugly (Referring to Humans) Beauty wouldn’t exist (Referring to himself)
Y/N (Looks at Apollo dead straight into his eyes with zero hesitation): Thank you for your sacrifice
Apollo (Shocked Pikachu Face):
Human Fighters and Brunhilde (Proceed to die as they all busted their lungs from laughing too hard):
Leodonis (Grinning): Oh, I definitely like this one…
Apollo was instantly KO’d by the Verbal Damage Y/N hit him with (While Loki, Shiva and Hermes are trying not to laugh)
~RECORD OF RAGNAROK no sense🤪 ~
Episode 16
Loki:*black eye *
Thor:....what did you do this time?
Loki:... Ask Y/N...
Thor:????
Thor:*black eye*
Hermes:What happened to you???
Thor/Loki: Ask Y/N.
Hermes:???
Hermes:*black eye*
Loki:....
Thor:....
Hercules:Should I even ask what happened to you?
Loki/Hermes/Thor:Ask Y/N.
Hercules:*with a black eye* ....
Shiva:....Guys what the heck happened to you??
Loki/Hermes/Thor:Ask...
Hercules:*on the verge of crying* I just asked Y/N what happened. She said nothing but it was clear that something was wrong so I asked her why she was angry and then she punched me!*crying*
Loki:Idiot...now he won't know our pain.
Shiva:So you wanted to send me to her just to get punched.
Loki:Exactly.
Shiva:Well I wouldn't have done that regardless.
Thor:Why?
Shiva:Are you serious?! Like hell I will approach that girl while she is on her period. Having 3 wives sure teaches you something about it.
The 4 gods:.....Oh that's why she was angry....
Shiva:*facepalm* "Idiots"
[Owlie note: IT WAS HARD TO ME WRITING HERCULES GETTING HURT🥺]
~RECORD OF RAGNAROK no sense 😌~
Episode 20
Y/N: Zeus listen an advice from a wise person.
Zeus:Since when you're wise?
Y/N:Shush and hear me out.
Zeus:*sighs and listens*
Y/N:women are like glass....fragile...you can break them...
Zeus:That's true. *smirks*
Y/N: ..BUT....if you try to step on them....they will fucking hurt you*evil smirk*
Zeus:*sweatdrops*
Y/N:And that's why I made a few calls. *snaps their fingers* Ladies!
*all Zeus' human lovers + Hera come out*
Zeus:*knows that he's fucked*
Y/N:I believe that is time for your revenge.
Hera:LET'S FUCKING KICK HIS OLD CHEATING ASS!
The girls: YES!
Zeus: Oh would you look at the time! I gotta go!! *gets chained * WTF!?
Y/N: Not so fast old man. You gotta pay for your crimes *smirks and gives Hera a pair of scissors*
BONUS:
~Olympus~
All the gods could hear Zeus' high pitched screams.
Herakles:Nobody is gonna help him...right??
Hermes:Nope. *smiles*
Ares: I care about my life.*clearly scared of his mother*
Poseidon:Not me *reads*
Hades:He has to learn from his mistakes.
RECORD OF RAGNAROK NO SENSE
Episode 25
Y/N:YO HERK OPEN THE F**ING DOOR IM HERE!
Hercules:*opens the door*Hey Y/N!! Welcome to my home!
Y/N: Man it's not the first time I came here. Is everything ready??Is the old man out of the house??
Hercules:*chuckles *Yes he's not here tonight , did you bring the forbidden goods???
Y/N:*evilly smirks and shows every kind of junk food* Have I ever disappointed ya?
Hercules: Never.
Y/N stayed at Hercules house for their first sleepover, they had so much fun together while playing videogames eating junk food. They have been best friends for years now but never had the chance to do a sleepover due to some grumpy old man.
~The next morning~
Y/N:*wakes up * mmmm *groans * I hate mornings so much...
Hercules:*still sleeping*
Y/N:*smirks* Come on big baby...rise and shine, time to get your ass up!! I want breakfast you are the cook between the two of us! *
Hercules:*opens his eyes* Give me five minutes Y/N~ * very deep morning voice*
*Y/N.exe has stopped working*
Bonus!!
~A few days later ~
Hermes:*drinking coffee*
Y/N:.....
Hermes: For a big softy like him my brother sure has a very deep morning voice, am I right??
Y/N:.....I hate you so much....*gives him 20 dollars*
Hermes:*smiles*
Yandere Alphabet w/ Hermes
Affection — how do they show their love and affection?
He'll bake you little goodies and cook you meals. Sometimes they might be drugged with things to call you down but sometimes they're not. He'll also play some songs for you on his violin.
Blood — how messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?
He is willing to get messy but doesn't prefer it. He doesn't like making messes or getting dirty but if he has to he will.
Cruelty — how would they treat their darling once abducted?
Depends on how darling acts. If darling is rude then he is rude if darling is chill then he is nice and gentle. But even then he can be a little sadistic. He just likes to see you cry from time to time and have you beg but nothing much.
Darling — aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?
Depends. If darling is being terrible he might need to teach them a lesson and depending on what they did will depend on what he does. He might touch and grope you even if you try to shrug him off. He would never go as far as showing you off on display though. No one but him will get to touch you and see your beauty; not even his family. Ares is to stupid and rough to be able to admire your beauty, Zeus...(well need I say more?), Apollo has so many women and men already he doesn't need another one especially if he is just gonna treat you like a whore.
Exposed — how vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?
He isn't exposed much. He just doesn't open up not because he doesn't love you he does. But he just doesn't because there truly isn't a need for him to do so.
Fight — how would they feel if their darling fought back?
He would be amused at first then, it would be irritating. He thought it was cute you thought you could escape. Then you kept trying and it's like you don't even see him as a god an just a weak human.
Game — is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?
He doesn't view it as a game but finds it pretty amusing. Watching you try and escape from him, a god. He chuckles and let's you get your hopes up and run to find a god to help you. But no god in there right mind is gonna mess with his Darling (Well Buddha will but you didn't reach him in time). He'll then quickly scoop you back into his arms and talk to you in a condescending manner. Why would you think you'd be able to escape?
Hell — what would be their darling’s worst experience with them?
When you tried to run to his brothers or father for help. It pissed him off. You could practically feel his aura coming off him. He kept the same smile but you could tell he was planning something. He slammed you against the wall and pinned you by your neck. Why did you go to his brothers? Did you want them more than him? Did you honestly think they were gonna help you? What was the point? Was it just to make me mad? Your in for a whole world of hurt :/
Ideals — what kind of future do they have in mind for their darling?
One where your basically his lap dog. You obey all his commands and don't put up a fight. You basically fall into Stockholm syndrome and view him as you should've in he first place. A god.
Jealousy — do they get jealous? How do they handle it?
He hardly ever gets jealous but when he does it probably because of something to do with his brothers. You were talking with Ares and although Ares is not competition it pisses him off to no end to see you talking to him. Then Zeus pulls you in and clearly flirting and suggesting things to you. He would simply say something that could be read as aggressive and scoop you up in his arms and take you away.
Kisses — how do they act around or with their darling?
He's the same person he is with everyone else. But he is more loving and gentle with you but also a little sadistic. He'll whisper sweet things in your ear while he is treating your body harshly. He is also an obsessive and manipulative yandere so...
Love letters — how would they go about approaching their darling?
He would try to court you by taking you on dates. He's cooking for you and getting you jewelry if you like that stuff. If that doesn't work then he's kidnapping you lmao.
Mask — are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?
Not really but like I said he'll be more loving (and sadistic). You can totally see his yandere behaviors.
Naughty — how would they punish their darling?
By bending you over his lap and spanking you. It is probably psychical but he can and will punish you with non physically.
Oppression — how many rights would they take away from their darling?
Some you keep more than most darlings. He won't rape or SA you. He's better than that and he won't make you walk around with no clothes in his house. You also have free reign of the house and can use whatever you want in the house. Wether that be internet or even knives. You can't call anyone and you need a divine weapon to even hurt him.
Patience — how patient are they with their darling?
He is pretty patient it is gonna take a lot for him to snap. But when he does...you better stay begging and praying.
Quite — if their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?
If darling dies he would be shocked and sad for a bit. He would grieve and move on but he probably won't get another. Its a surprise he felt that way in the first place. If darling escapes he will just find them which want take less than a day.
Regret — would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling?
No 💀
Stigma — what brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?
Probably more curiosity and wanting to feed this strong emotion he's getting. He can be greedy I mean he's a god after all.
Tears — how do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?
He doesn't always enjoy but he doesn't care much. It will get annoying after a while but if he can't handle it he will gag you.
Unique — would they do anything different from the classic yandere?
Yeah he would probably let you out without supervision. I mean where would you go? He would let you out and you think you would have a chance but then you almost fall to your death and your reminded where you are. He knows you can't get anywhere or hide so he lets you roam and when you think your being slick he ends up by your side in an instant just smirking with a condescending look on his face.
Vice — what weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?
There isn't anything you could exploit he knows how to keep a cool head. He does everything with purpose and he plans for everything. You ain't escaping him 😂
Wit’s end — would they ever hurt their darling?
He would but would only before his pleasure. If you misbehave he is putting you in his lap and spanking you. Wether or not you enjoy it he is hurting you. He enjoys seeing you beg and helpless for him. It reminds you of your place and how you need to watch your mouth.
Xoanon — how much would they revere or worship their darling?
He isn't worshipping you but he doesn't really expect you to worship him. He honestly doesn't care if you. Does he get some sort of feeling in his chest when you do of course because he is a god. But he isn't like those stuck up gods who need to be showered in mortal's praise.
Yearn — how long do they pine after their darling before they snap?
2 months. He would need to accept his feelings then he would try to court you normally. If that doesn't work he is then preparing his bike for you and after that kidnaping you so honestly could be shorter than 2months.
Zenith — would they ever break their darling?
He would and he would not feel bad about it. He probably wanted to break you in the first place. Strong willed and not giving in easily? Well now your broken lol.
All I Feel, is Rage...
Ror men with their s/o is experiencing her Feminine Rage Era.
Requested Characters: Various.
Notes: It's my first time writing something about this, please have mercy...
He is Confused.
Don't get him wrong, he absolutely loves you, and for everything you are, but to see you in a state like this puts him on ...edge to say the least.
He's heard about this feminine rage era through other beings, hearing its just a trend. However, to see it right infront of his eyes. Damn...
He's concerned for you, but according to the manual guide on, "How to Fully Support Your Partner" , by the valkyries, he's supposed to just calm you down, and agree with what you have to say.
No matter how wrong it is.
HERCULES, Jack the Ripper, Sasaki Kojiro, ARES, and anyone else on your mind...
He's awfully entertained.
Don't get him wrong. He feels awful for what you're going through. But honestly, he finds it hard not to laugh.
How is it possible that someone, or some people have made you so angry, that you turn out like this?
Feminine rage era you say? Well, this one is for the books. Don't worry he'll listen to what you have to complain about, but he isn't letting this down any time soon...
LOKI, Shiva, Hermes, Qin Shi Huang, BUDDHA, and anyone else on your mind...
He finds it attractive.
Manz had to rethink his life decisions, because... Oh my days, you look like a mess. A hot mess. His hot mess.
The way your hands pull onto your hair, the scream you made when you were ranting about your boss, coworker, anyone who just so happened to push you beyond your limits...
Honestly, he could watch you rant and walk around endlessly for almost the whole day and not be bothered by it. As long as it's not directed to him, he's fine...
And your boss? Don't worry about them, he'll take care of it...
THOR, Poseidon, HADES, Apollo, Lu bu, and anyone else on your mind...
Don't we all have those days...
My inbox is open. Check out my Rules.
Screw it, I’m shooting my shot
Ahem.
Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist. Right?
.
.
"If you just wanted a kiss you could've just asked, darling."
Hermes bowed slightly and placed a chaste kiss on Ghost's forehead and cheek before straightening back up and patting down his suit to release any wrinkles made.
