Old People - Tumblr Posts
I feel like old people go to church ‘cus they got nothing better to do.
It's interesting that the young people now all want to be: sober, and chaste.
Times have definitely changed.
i love you sober friendly spaces i love you restaurants w mocktails on the menu i love you social events not hosted at bars i love you bringing non-alcoholic drinks to parties i love you shamelessly being sober so people know it’s accepted i love you not making fun of ppl who don’t drink i love you still inviting people who don’t drink to social events where ppl are drinking if u know they’re comfortable w it i love you normalizing not drinking
I love that laughing and chitchat abounds even in old age, it's universal.
Old People Restaurant Scam. You know the scam. Whine about perfectly good food to get some sort of comp.
In their old age, my parents befriended another older couple who would pull this stunt everywhere they went. After my mother told me a few stories about how their new friends had shown them how to get discounted or free meals, I felt like I was suddenly the responsible adult, concerned about the bad influence these people were on my parents.
While visiting my parents with my girlfriend, this other couple attended dinner with us. As I expected, the food was brought to the table and they immediately began dramatically complaining to one another about the quality/taste/temperature/etc. They were making a scene in order to attract the attention of the waitress. When our waitress returned to ask how we were doing, the miserable old bastard who played the lead role in their act took a deep breathe, struck a dramatic pose (with his hand raised to begin gesticulating for emphasis) and bega–I leaned forward and cut him off before he could finish the first word: “Everything is absolutely fantastic. It’s all great! Thank you very much!” She smiled, and began her obligatory “Great, well if you need any–” when he made a second attempt. “We come here all the time an–”. I didn’t acknowledge that he was speaking at all, repeated that all was just as we ordered and thank her again.
He was stunned and thrown off from his routine by my interruption. During this pause the waitress walked away (It seemed clear that she knew what they were trying to accomplish). He turned bright red. I turned to my girlfriend and, smiling and without lowering my voice, stated how pitiful it is that some people could be dishonest, deceitful and put at risk the livelihood of a cook, server or hostess for a pathetic discount or a free early-bird special. My passive-aggressive reverse-parenting broke my parents of the habit in short time.
A little teaser of a picture I’m finishing up for another 3rd year project I’m working on. Will post the whole picture if I’m allowed to when finished.
I was scrolling through TikTok minding my own business at midnight when I came across fucking Andrew Lloyd Webber. Apparently he has a TikTok account, and I checked it isn’t some bot or fan page this 75 year old man has a TikTok account. (And no I’m not theater kid enough to know ALW’s age off the top of my head I had to google it.) WTF even is the world.
You wanna know how I came across it, I saw he had posted the “I’m sorry you weren’t a teenage dirtbag” trend.
Wake up hearing my name and man, my grandmother will never get any better…
Old cunt will not listen to reason or truth. I guess people these days don’t want to be reasoned with.
Rtgame is my favorite senior streamer
The ironic thing about old conservatives is they have disposable income and are not fiscally conservative. So they don't give money to bums, but donate to politicians.
how come all the teachers who are at the age where they've just gotten a few young grandchildren make presentations with random pictures that have to do with the words they are using but are actually largely unrelated and unhelpful to what they're talking about
this one time in high school I got really sick, but like, not that sick, because my only symptoms were congestion and a really, really sore throat. but it was getting really close to finals week. and I was a freshman. and my math teacher did not like freshmen.
like, I'm not sure he disliked freshmen more than a lot of teachers probably do. it was probably a normal amount of disliking. and I don't think he graded us worse or anything. but he was vocal about it. he liked to call freshmen "weak butter." no kidding. I guess because he thought freshmen were generally too weak and soft. like he was an army commander or whatever—idk anything about military ranks. I don't think he was ever actually in the military, but he coached the golf team, so I guess that's pretty similar.
he always said stuff like how being sick isn't a real reason not to come to school. old people stuff or whatever. he was one of those "you better be in the hospital" kinda guys. he always said whenever he started feeling bad he would just drink some orange juice and have some mint ice cream.
I tried that once. it didn't work and was also just not a very good flavor combination.
anyways, back to me getting sick.
so my throat hurt really bad. like, super bad. so bad. like you know when you burn your tongue really bad and suddenly you're like wow I never knew bread was so scratchy? like that. on fire.
we generally had a bag of cough drops in the miscellaneous medicine bucket in the broom closet at my house. but there weren't a lot left, so I ate them all. we ran out. so my dad got more, and he brought home one of those giant bags. the ones with like 80 cough drops. like it's not a truly unreasonable size, really, but that's a heck of a lot bigger than the normal-sized ones.
for whatever reason, I decided I was just going to bring around the whole thing instead of just taking some of them with me, so for like three days I had this enormous bag of hall's cherry-flavored cough drops in my backpack. I was eating them constantly. a continuous stream. like a chain smoker.
this is about the time I looked up on the internet if eating too many cough drops can be bad for you. the answer is basically no, unless you're eating them regularly, which just decreases the efficacy (makes sense) or if you ate like a thousand in five seconds, which I'm pretty sure isn't very possible. so I was safe.
but yeah, there I was, ploughing through this giant bag of cough drops like there was no tomorrow and they were the miniature hard candy angels bringing me relief for today. I had cough drop wrappers in my jacket pockets for months afterward. so I'm like "yeah this seems like a concerning amount of cough drops. I could have perhaps stayed home instead of coming to school. that might've been wise. but I powered through, just like [math teacher] says."
so I went up to him and wanted to let him know that I suffered through it as per his advice and he just said "well, of course."
and the sheer disappointment from that reaction has instilled the need to approach every sore throat since then with the same strategy of gorging myself on cough drops, whether I stay home or not. hope you're happy, dude.
Either everyone hates me, or I need a nap
But tbh I just think everyone hates
old people out there like this if you would send me money
- love, a closeted trans nonbinary kid! who wants critters, tattoos, piercings, and to go to college (plus top surgery)
I love old people so much aging is thr most complexly beautiful process. I think my favorite thing in the entire world is when u talk to a cool old person who has lived their full life and understand themselves and the world and they tell stories in which u can truelly visualize and understand there process of living and being and u can almost see them grow up and then die. Ahhh I love it. THE CIRCLE OF LIFE IS SO AMAZING. Like the way we r born n then w e die like fucking genius. Whoever invented this shit like woah ur crazy this shit mental!!
8th January 2014
Brush pen this time! An old man I saw in Costa while I was killing time before seeing Frozen.
Why do parents feel the need to listen to Facebook videos on full volume, with no headphones in a room where other people can hear what they’re listening to...? I don’t wanna hear a list of facts about Reba McEntire. I don’t wanna know the recipe for the quiche you’re gonna try forcing me to help you make this weekend. I want you to use the four sets of headphones I’ve bought you over the past few years, specifically so you can listen to shit on your phone without disturbing anyone.
I am, how you might say...✨irritated✨
Anybody else creeped out when friends of their parents (50+ yr olds) come up out of the blue and say “Man, if I was 20 yrs younger” or something along those lines, as if it’s a compliment? Like you, a middle aged/old man, just came up to a 22 yr old in front of her mother and essentially said you were sexually attracted to them. In public. Yet my Mom’s standing there like it’s just a cute folksy thing to say.
