Musings - Tumblr Posts
welcome back to Epic Rap Battles, today Boris the Animal from Men in Black 3 will rap battle with Dennis Feinstein from Parks and Recreation, place your bets now folks
you ever just not want to deal with a problem, so you throw a neutron star at it and then dropkick the whole thing into a black hole
REMEMBER KIDS, ALWAYS KEEP AN [Boeing AH-64 Apache Attack Helicopter] IN YOUR [Inventorium] AT ALL TIMES IF ANY [Lowly trash] TRIES TO [Clown Around Town] YOUR [Insert Gender Here], GIVE THEM A [Smooth Taste] OF [Perish] WITH YOUR [Boeing AH-64 Apache Attack Helicopter] AND IF A [Little Nipper] TRIES TO [Kill You], BRING OUT YOUR [Boeing AH-64 Apache Attack Helicopter] TO GIVE THEM A [[90% Off Evisceration]] DEAL, AND HELP THEM [[See God For $0.00]] !!! SHOW THOSE [City Livin'] [Schmucks] WHO [Plays The Cards] AND HOLDS THE [Boeing AH-64 Apache Attack Helicopter] DON'T HAVE A [Boeing AH-64 Apache Attack Helicopter] ??? [Specil Deal] EXCLUSIVE TO [Insert Gender Here] NOW, YOU CAN [[BUY]] [[At The Low Low Price Of]] [[$4.99]] ! CAN'T [[Afford]] IT ? JUST BUY [[90% Off Weedkiller]] AND [Burning Acid] THOSE [Schmoes] IN THE [Eyes] !!$! LET'S ALL HAVE A [Unintelligible Laughter] WATCHING [The Haters (c)] SHED [Blood, Sweat, and Tears] ! !!
It takes nine days for an anvil to fall from Heaven to Earth in Greek mythology. Using the time of nine days and a known downwards acceleration of 9.8m/s^2 of Earth's gravity, we can calculate the approximate distance of Heaven from our planet. In this essay I will
Voldemort vs. Extremely Determined And Permanently High Latin Major With A Wand And Excessive Spell Creativity
the feminine urge to write OTP oneshots based off Expanse book titles
Waldo is a master criminal well known for his ability to blend into any environment, excelling in urban spaces. He may possess some form of immortality along with the ability to move across time and space (and possibly cross the boundaries into works of fiction), seen throughout history and across a variety of different universes and worlds. His latest hit involves the theft of over 100 million dollars worth of precious gemstones from British Museum Version PK-334. If you see him, contact the transdimensional authorities and inform them of his whereabouts before he slips away again.
she railgun on my spaceship until goddamnit they hit the fucking reactor and the ship is going to explode and we're all going to fucking die
so is there like a limit on the capabilities of the 'accio' spell
could you just say 'accio W88 Thermonuclear Warhead' and it would be there or do you have to see it to call it, what are the upper limiting capabilities of this spell
Oh god I spilled warships all over my island chain and accidentally recreated the largest naval battle in history
Things I have learned this year:
Once you're dead, nobody cares what scars you had. Nobody's going to remember what other people did to you. The only things that remain of you are a tombstone and the scars you've left on others.
There is nothing you can do to make someone cruel treat you better. You cannot become so miserable that they would finally have pity on you. If they were capable of feeling it, they would pity you for thinking that.
Being cruel is the easiest thing in the world. It's not even funny how easy it would be to become a monster the first second you are not the most vulnerable creature in the room. It takes strength to be gentle when you're angry.
You can't fix your problems all at once. But you can substitute them with progressively smaller and smaller problems, until you've reached one that's small enough to fix.
Wash blood and shit with cold water. Hot water makes blood stick to the fabric more. It has no effect on shit, but hot shit water smells worse.
There's a difference between being tough, and being broken down so badly that you can't be broken further. Being able to take a punch because you're used to being abused doesn't make you strong, it just tells the people who'd do that to you that you've already been broken in.
You can be proud of getting by on less than you'd deserve for as long as you had no choice, but living in the gutter just to boast about surviving there while you're not even trying to get yourself to a better place is just sad.
People who don't hurt people on purpose actually apologize when they hurt someone by accident. People who don't hurt people on purpose only hurt people by accident. They don't classify "things I did on purpose" as a special kind of hurt that would actually warrant an apology (which they won't give anyhow).
There's a difference between carrying a grudge and just being careful. If you're still lamenting how they ruined your life and how you wish they were dead when they're already dead, you're just being bitter.
You don't have to choose between cursing G-d for your sorry fate, and getting up to fix your shit. You can multitask. Curse while you work. He didn't come down here to save you, and He won't come down here to smite you either.
Your measure and your worth have jack shit to do with what kind of a father you had. You should worry more about what kind of a father your children have.
Like cats, chickens and white people are sometimes born with blue eyes that change color as they grow up.
I need non autistic people to realise meltdowns are a real debilitating thing that has a serious effect on your mental and physical health NOWWWWW!!! The way its been trivialized and lessened pisses me the fuck off. It's not a tantrum and it doesn't come from "being too weak-willed" it's painful and it's embarrassing AND MOST OF ALL IT'S INVOLUNTARY!! Don't claim to be an ally to autistic or disabled people and then make fun of people who have meltdowns. Literally get the hell out of my sight
A reminder to all my lovely fellow writers: progress is progress, even when it isn't. Writing four thousand words in a session is progress. Writing a hundred words in a session is progress. Removing an entire scene because it doesn't flow well is progress. Rethinking your plan for the plot in order to get unstuck is progress. Development looks different for every writer and every story.
it's actually really weird to me that both for US passports and CA driver licenses* have you remove your glasses for the official id photograph b/c glasses can WILDLY change what your face looks like. Like I look really different wearing glasses versus not (i also will usually do makeup differently) and if i'm traveling, im probably going to be wearing my glasses over like contacts or something (i need them to see, they're easier to wear for long periods, i like to take them off for sleeping,etc). It just seems like a weird choice for an image that's supposed to be easily identifiable as you, for them to pedantically require you to not wear the disability aid you will definitely be wearing when you have to go use it (and that changes how you look)
*probably other states too? i don't recall MA or TX making me remove glasses for photos but that was awhile ago, maybe they've all changed their stance on it
(applying for a new passport and looking at the photo reqs etc. good news everyone! if you're non binary you can get an "x" on your passport like it's on the official form now. along with a snarky little comment about how other countries might not be as accepting as the us about it, like okay jan, sit down. ::eye roll:: )