Alexander The Great - Tumblr Posts
“Where is he? Where is he? There he is!”
That sniff, huh
“Where is he? Where is he? There he is!”
That sniff, huh
ANAKIN AND ALEXANDER THE GREAT ARE THE SAME?????
“Before and After”
“Before and After”
ALEXANDER THE GREAT (Dir: Robert Rossen, 1956).
Richard Burton heads the cast in a historical drama chronicling the life and accomplishments of Alexander III of Macedonia. Part of the trend to entice audiences away from television, the lavish production was shot in glorious Technicolor and utilised the widescreen CinemaScope format.
Read the full review on my blog JINGLE BONES MOVIE TIME. Link below.
Welcome back, Alexander the Great
Imagine I go to the hairdresser to dye my hair and the person working there, in attempt to make small talks, asks me why did i decide to go blond and then I'll have no choice but to tell them all about Achilles son of Peleus and to explain his story and rage and also to explain why I'm so him and ofc I then will have to go on about the importance of Patroclus in Achilles' story and then similarities and parallels between them and me n my partner and-
323 BCE.
Portrait of the King of the World with Macedonian Sun and the ram-headed Zeus Amun.
Portrait of an Unknown Man with Curly Hair, damaged
Wanted to play with Fayum-style mummy portraits for Alexander and Hephaestion.
You know, your handwriting looks really uniform, I thought it was typed! I bet you could fined a font program to scribe your letters to, and then you can get your "handwritten" style without killing your hands!
I already do have a couple of fonts in my handwriting, but typing it out doesn't have the organic flow and whimsy which I like about manually writing it.
It doesn't kill my hands per se, but the idea of doing 300+ pages of handwriting and then having to go through copyedits is a chore. And I would know - I had to rewrite all 660 pages of The Carpet Merchant. 😓
Greek(Medieval) Warfare;
Everyone is debating on whether the Greeks fought in a phalanx of bronze;
No one is wondering if the Greeks could afford to fight in a phalanx of bronze.
What’s your favourite Alexander the Great story?
Probably how he tamed his horse, because that is some straight up Mary Sue level bullshit that no one would ever believe except the people who saw it wrote it down going “Yeah son of a bitch the kid did it what the hell.”
“average ancient greek general founded 3 cities named after himself” factoid actualy just statistical error. the median greek general founded 0 cities named after himself. Alexander the Great, who conquered the Achaemenid Persian Empire and founded over 10,000 Alexandrias in his lifetime, was a statistical outlier adn should not have been counted
I love Alexander the Great because if he was a fictional character you would yell “THAT’S JUST NOT REALISTIC WTF MAN YOU CAN’T WIN A BATTLE AFTER BEING ATTACKED FROM BEHIND AND HAVE TO WHEEL YOUR WHOLE FUCKIN ARMY AND FIGHT YOUR WAY ACROSS A RIVER AND UPHILL AGAINST A LARGER ARMY"
But
“Look conquering an island by making it not an island any more is ridiculous that’s never going to be believable.”
But
He just fuckin did that shit.
If a character is named Alexander/Alex there's a 99.99% chance that the character will be queer and badass.
We have,
Alexander Hamilton- founding father. Was super bi. Wrote stuff for the constitution, was a lawyer, treasury secretary, did not like Jefferson. Was very very in love with John Laurens his bestfriend.
Alex Standall- most of you probably know the guy. Extremely sarcastic and badass. Shot himself in the head but that just made him even more sarcastic. Got the happy ending he (The guy is literally in love with the human form of golden retriever) deserved. Kinda looks like troye sivan.
Alexander Gideon Lightwood/Alec- everyone knows him. He's a shadowhunter. Fell in love with a warlock, first kissed him in front of the whole institute on his wedding day to a different girl and the went on a date. Everyone knows that this salty piece of shit turns into a puddle of happiness when his husband is around. From saying, 'Emotions are nothing but a distraction,' to, 'I can't live without you, Magnus.' Is super badass just like his husband. Did I mention that he has a husband?? He's pretty awesome.
Alex Fierro- child of Loki. a king and queen. Love them. They are pretty badass and I like how half the time Magnus will just be in awe of them.
Alex Claremont-Diaz- AHHHHHHHHHHHH yes now let's continue, he's the first son of the United States. Not only did he fall in love with Prince Henry, they both had a wonderful love-fight in the rain while they confessed their love to eachother. He's badass, sarcastic, a little oblivious sometimes, loves Henry. His entire family is badass to be honest. Is super bi and is named after Alexander Hamilton. He hopes to be a great lawyer.
Alexander the Great- probably the first Alexander to be not straight. Had like three wives but still went like, "that man too is Alexander," while referring to Hephaestion- his childhood friend and General of his forces. Loved Hephaestion and saw him as his equal. They even went to the tomb of Achilles and Patroclus- another iconic couple- and paid respects (Alexander paid Achilles respect while Hephaestion for Patroclus). He has even compared their love as equal to Achilles and Patroclus. When Hephaestion died, he was sad and then died under mysterious causes eight months later. He was the greatest conqueror and the very first Alexander to be very very queer.
These are the Alexanders that I know of. If you guys know more please let me know.
We infer from this list, that all Alexanders are super not straight, the name itself is like a package deal, they are all badass with equally sweet significant others and they are all sarcastic but as I said, that's a package deal with the name. Keep in mind, the list above is in no particular order and was written at 6 in the morning while being severely sleep deprived.
Hephaestion wakes up with a start. There were people running around outside his tent, he could hear them. Far away, he could hear thundering footsteps against the earth and a war horn blowing. It was still early in the morning but the enemies were there to attack. Sighing, he turns to see Alexander sleeping next to him.
Hephaestion hated a lot of things about Alexander. He hated how much he drunk, he hated his arrogance, his anger, his pride, he hated so many things about Alexander. Alexander who was strong, who was the prince, who was hailed as the son of Zeus, who killed his own father to take the throne. In Alexander's defence his father was a dick.
But the thing is, Alexander was his friend. No matter what Alexander did, Hephaestion was unable to hate him. And now, he slept without any care in the world when enemies were right outside. And the reason he slept without a care was because Hephaestion was the General to his armies and he knew that Hephaestion would win.
They win that battle. Like they always do. And when they reach the royal family who attacked them, their queen falls on his knees before Hephaestion to beg for her life and her children's. "You are mistaken. I am not the King."
The queen's eyes widens. Before she could apologise Alexander smiles at her kindly. "You were not mistaken, Mother. This man too is Alexander." And then walks away.
Hephaestion watches as Alexander sits at the throne of the king they just defeated. "I will not harm you or your family but in turn you must welcome me as your ruler." He tells the court and they all bow to him. Hephaestion tilts his head and goes to stand next to him.
This is how things have been for the longest time. Hephaestion was always beside Alexander. Wherever the King resided the General was beside him. Even when they were children and Alexander couldn't bear to stay inside with his father and mother, Hephaestion and Alexander would stay under the stars and talk about seeing the world. Alexander wanted to see everything, he wanted to see worlds beyond the stars, he wanted to see Olympus, he wanted to see the Gods. Hephaestion was to be beside him. Nowhere else. Hephaestion thinks when Alexander talks about wars, battles and conquest; he would be nowhere else than here. They were too alike, even in the way they dressed, acted and spoke.
And when Alexander became King, he listened to Hephaestion more than he listened to anyone else. He hears his father's subjects but takes only Hephaestion's words to heart. And even now, after so many battles and wars, he still heeds only his words and not anyone else.
The queen kneels before Alexander and offers her daughter in marriage as a sign of acceptance but he refuses, saying that the king is still alive and he would wed her daughter only after the king is dead.
They stay in the city that they won for a few nights, even if Alexander had two wives he still tumbled into Hephaestion's bed. And Alexander acts like it's perfectly fine to sleep in Hephaestion's room and not let him sleep. When they touch each other, it was simply need instead of want and when they slept beside one another that was need as well.
They leave to hunt down the king who escaped the battlefield. They find him after days of travel. They kill him very easily. The defeated king did not gain safety from anyone and was wandering from the day of battle with his injuries unattended. While they ride back home Alexander tells Hephaestion to take the queen's other daughter as his bride. Hephaestion agrees because it would strengthen their campaign.
They get married to the princesses on the same day. The third wife for Alexander and the very first bride for Hephaestion.
Few days later Hephaestion is planning for their next battle and Alexander is reading on the table. And when Hephaestion's words get too loud, he closes the scroll and looks at him. Hephaestion stops talking.
"Are you quite done?"
"Yes." Hephaestion answers.
"Good." Alexander says and kisses him.
Hephaestion laughs. "Three wives. You have three wives."
"They are not you." Alexander says and that was that.
When they reach their next battlefield Hephaestion's skin itches. He doesn't want to be there. And it is worse after they win the battle. It was clear that something bad was going to come. He stays beside Alexander and doesn't allow anyone unknown near him. Alexander hosts games in honor of their victory and few days before the games Hephaestion coughs up blood and realizes that he was the one who is dying.
Still he does his duties but the day when they are supposed to leave for the games, Hephaestion stays back and promises that he would join him a few days later, after he oversees the construction of the monument for Hephaestion.
He feels fine for a few days. Then the sickness sets in and he loses himself. And whenever he comes back, there is someone beside him, taking care of him but it's not Alexander. In his sickness he dreams of many things. But when he wakes up he doesn't remember them. He thinks about the time he was with Alexander. There never has been a time when he hasn't been with him. He thinks about the time they visited the tomb of Achilles and Patroclus. Alexander had honoured Achilles while Hephaestion honoured Patroclus, then they had raced and felt the air in their hair and skin.
Hephaestion thinks that he has never told Alexander that he has loved him. He told him that he will stay beside him, win him battles and conquer the world with him. But he has never told him about his affections. Alexander had said that Hephaestion and him were the same. Had he known all along?
Hephaestion thinks that he was not meant to grow old. Heroes never grow old. They always go out in a blaze of fire and glory. Patroclus had died in battle with Achilles's armour on him. Hephaestion who was Alexander's armour is going to die alone.
Hephaestion dies and the rage of the King is uncontrollable. His grief is uncontrollable. Alexander arrives the night of the day Hephaestion dies. And he kills so many people. He killes Hephaestion's physician, the guards and almost a hundred men for his funeral. And when he is not cutting down men like grass he is crying on the floor like he was in pain and no one can placate him. Three wives and Alexander threatens to kill anyone who comes near him.
Alexander fights and wins. Heroes don't grow old. But living while your other half is gone, is a far greater tragedy than anything else. What was conquering the sun and the stars if Hephaestion wasn't there? When Alexander dies eight months later, he doesn't think of Olympus, the Gods, his Empire or his conquests. He thinks of Hephaestion.
Be not afraid of ｇｒｅａｔｎｅｓｓ. —William Shakespeare
Girls don't want boyfriends. Girls want an expensively made Medici-styled historical drama HBO show about Alexander the Great
(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kpch-tOIxT8)