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Lou-0111 - Lou!! - Tumblr Blog
I Won’t Say (I’m in Love)
y/n doesnt believe in love, taylor, their best friend (who knows their view on love) tries to convince that luke would be a great boyfriend for them: bit of a long one today - 3.4k words
Love is stupid, ok? It’s pointless and there is absolutely no need for it. And no, It’s not just because I've had bad experiences, it’s the whole thing. Girls changing themselves for the boy they like. Boys being mean to people to get girls attention, the whole thing is just stupid.
If there's a prize for rotten judgement I guess I've already won that
I feel like I’ve made a series of poor decisions in my life, each one heavier than the last. This pattern of regret and self-reproach feels like it’s consuming me from within. It's become almost second nature to make mistakes because I've fallen into the habit of making them, and each misstep adds to the weight of my past errors.
No man is worth the aggravation
No guy at Camp Half-Blood is worth going through that emotional turmoil again. It’s simply easier to avoid falling in love altogether. The past is full of lessons learned—the kind where you thought you'd finally moved on, only to find yourself trapped in the same old cycles. The gods had their trials, and there's no need for us to repeat their mistakes.
That's ancient history, been there, done that
This happened to the gods in the past, it shouldn't be repeating with us again
Who d'you think you're kiddin'? He's the earth and heaven to you
“Y/N, you have to listen to me on this.” My best friend, Taylor starts, “Luke would be the perfect boyfriend for you. First, he’s genuinely kind-hearted. It’s not just something he puts on for show—he’s consistently thoughtful and considerate in everything he does. You’ve seen it yourself, right? How he interacts with everyone around him, always making sure people are okay and that they’re feeling included.
And let’s talk about his skills—he’s an exceptional swordsman. His dedication and proficiency with a sword are impressive.
But it’s not just about physical skills. Luke is amazing with the younger campers. He’s got this natural ability to connect with them, to mentor them, and to make them feel important. He treats them with such patience and respect. You know how much that matters, seeing someone who doesn’t just see the younger kids as a burden but genuinely enjoys helping them grow.
So, don’t let your past experiences cloud your judgement about him. Luke isn’t just another face in the crowd; he’s someone who genuinely fits what you need in your life. It’s worth considering that maybe, just maybe, he could be the one who changes your perspective on love.”
Everyday, every damn day, Taylor goes on about how me and Luke would be great together. But I don’t see it. Love is stupid, Taylor is stupid for thinking I like him.
Try to keep it hidden Honey, we can see right through you (Oh, no) Girl, you can't conceal it We know how you're feelin', who you're thinkin' of
We were walking back from training one day when again, she started the whole luke chat. “Y/N, I need to be real with you here. It’s becoming impossible to ignore how you keep watching Luke. You spend hours just observing him as he trains. It's not just casual glances; you’re practically mesmerised by how he moves with such skill and focus. Every time he picks up his sword, there’s this look in your eyes that I can’t ignore.”
Excuse me? He’s the best swordsman at camp, obviously I'm going to watch him, to get pointers on how to get better, nothing else.
“And it’s not just during training. When Luke interacts with the younger campers, your attention is entirely on him. You’ve seen how he takes the time to teach them, to encourage them, and how he genuinely connects with them on their level. You watch him as he patiently helps them learn and grow, and there’s this soft, almost admiring look on your face. It’s clear that you’re moved by how he treats them with such kindness and care.” “I just think it’s sweet how he takes his time teaching them, nothing more, I'd be the same way if anyone else did what he does.”
“I know you’re trying to play it cool and act like it doesn’t matter, but let’s be honest—your feelings are showing. It’s like you’re trying to hide behind this façade that love isn’t worth it or that you’re not interested, but it’s obvious to everyone around us. We all see how your face lights up when he’s around, how you hang onto his every word and action.”
“Woah, you need to slow down, someone might hear you, my face doesn't ‘light up’ ok Tay? I’m a listener, sorry if i listen when people talk to me, I don’t like luke, never have, never will.”
Stop denying it. We can see right through you. It’s not just about admiring him from a distance; it’s about the way you light up when you talk about him or when he’s in the room. Your actions are screaming that you have feelings for him, even if you’re trying to convince yourself otherwise. It’s ok if you like him, if you’re in love, it’ll be good to put your heart out again.”
Where my heart can get hurt again. I mumble walking away. I do not like Luke.
You swoon, you sigh Why deny it? Uh-oh It's too cliché (Ah-ah-ah-ah) I won't say I'm in love
Being in love feels like a foolish, unnecessary risk to me. It’s as if admitting that I’m in love would be an act of surrender, a sign of weakness. I keep telling myself that I don’t need a man to complete my life or make me happy. My independence has always been my strength, and the idea of falling for someone seems like it would undermine that strength.
I’ve managed perfectly well on my own, navigating life without relying on anyone else to validate my worth or fill a void. I’ve built my own stability and happiness through my own efforts, and I’m proud of that. The thought of opening myself up to love feels like an invitation to vulnerability and potential heartbreak, and I’m not ready to risk that.
Admitting that I’m in love would mean acknowledging that I need someone, and that’s something I’m determined to avoid. I don’t want to be in a position where my happiness depends on another person’s actions or feelings. I’ve seen how love can complicate things, how it can lead to disappointment and pain. It’s easier to stay detached and focus on myself rather than deal with the unpredictability of a romantic relationship.
I keep convincing myself that I’m better off without the emotional upheaval that love often brings. I’m self-sufficient and capable, and I don’t need anyone else to complete me or make me feel whole. Embracing love feels like it would disrupt the balance I’ve carefully created in my life. So, I put up a wall and tell myself that I’m not in love and that I don’t need a man to be content. It’s a way of protecting myself from the potential pain that comes with opening my heart.
I thought my heart had learned its lesson It feels so good when you start out (Ah) My head is screaming, "Get a grip, girl" "Unless you're dyin' to cry your heart out"
I won’t put myself through that again. I’ve been burned too many times by love to let it happen once more. Each time I’ve opened my heart in the past, I’ve ended up disappointed and hurt. The cycle seems to repeat itself with every relationship I’ve been in: the initial charm and allure give way to a painful reality that shatters the illusion.
Every guy I've been with starts off presenting the best version of themselves—perfectly polished, attentive, and seemingly sincere. They act like they’re everything I’ve ever wanted, showing me a side that makes me believe in the possibility of a true connection. But as time goes on, it’s like a switch flips, and suddenly, they’re no longer the person I thought they were. The transformation happens so swiftly and so completely that it feels like a betrayal. One day, everything seems perfect, and the next, I’m left grappling with someone who’s changed overnight.
It’s as though these men wear masks, carefully crafted to win me over, only to discard them once they’ve achieved their goal. The facade falls away, revealing a reality that’s often disappointing and disheartening. I’ve come to expect that this pattern will repeat itself because it always has. Each time, my trust and hope are eroded, and it becomes harder to believe that someone can truly be genuine.
I’ve reached a point where my heart simply can’t handle any more of this emotional turbulence. The pain of investing my emotions into someone who ends up disappointing me is too much to bear. The cycle of hope and heartbreak has left me exhausted and wary. I’m trying to shield myself from further damage, to protect my heart from the predictable cycle of rising expectations followed by crushing disillusionment. The idea of putting myself through that kind of emotional rollercoaster again feels unbearable. So, I shut down, convinced that avoiding love is the best way to preserve my peace and prevent further pain.
You keep on denying Who you are and how you're feeling Baby, we're not buying Hon, we saw you hit the ceiling (Oh, no) Face it like a grown-up When ya gonna own up That you got, got, got it bad?
"Y/N, It’s becoming impossible for anyone who knows you to ignore the signs. Your reactions when he’s near, the way you talk about him—it all points to something deeper than just friendship or admiration. You might be trying to downplay it or act like it’s not a big deal, but everyone can see it. We all notice how you light up when he’s mentioned or how you subtly seek out opportunities to be around him.
"Well why don't you go out with him? Since you notice every small detail about him."
You’re not fooling anyone with your attempts to mask your feelings. The way you talk about him, how your mood shifts when he’s mentioned—these are all clear indicators that your feelings for Luke run deeper than you’re willing to admit. It’s written all over your face and in your actions. It’s not just a small crush or a fleeting interest; it’s something more significant, something you’re clearly struggling to acknowledge.
So why keep pretending? It’s okay to have feelings for someone, especially someone like Luke. The sooner you accept and embrace your feelings, the easier it will be to figure out what to do next. Hiding behind this facade of indifference only makes it harder for you to deal with the truth." "Taylor, I cannot keep having this convosation with you, it's getting on my nerves, please just drop it." I'm never falling in love, with anyone.
(Shoo, shoo-doo, doo-doo) No chance, no way I won't say it, no, no Give up, give in Check the grin, you're in love This scene won't play I won't say I'm in love You're doin' flips (Ooh-ooh) Read our lips, you're in love
The idea of opening myself up to another relationship feels like an invitation to endure more pain. The thought of investing my emotions again, only to face the inevitable disappointment, is almost too overwhelming to consider. My heart has reached its limit; it feels battered and fragile from past letdowns. The fear of another heartbreak is paralysing, making it hard to even entertain the idea of risking my emotional well-being once more.
I want to protect myself from the cycle of hope and disillusionment that has characterised my past experiences with love. The emotional toll has been significant, and I’m desperately trying to shield myself from further damage. The prospect of enduring another emotional upheaval is daunting, and my heart simply can’t handle the strain of another potential letdown. "Y/N, I know you don't like talking about it, but I csn't help it. Why csn't you see it? We’ve all see how you blush every single time you talk about Luke. It’s not just a subtle thing—your cheeks practically light up, and there’s this undeniable warmth in your voice. It’s impossible to ignore the way your eyes sparkle when his name comes up or how your entire demeanour shifts to something more animated and bright.
And let’s not forget how you watch him during mealtimes. It’s like you’re drawn to him in a way that’s hard to miss. You’re always glancing over at him, whether he’s chatting with the others, helping out with the food, or just enjoying a moment with his friends. You might think you’re being discreet, but it’s so obvious to everyone around. The way you steal glances and the way your gaze lingers just a little too long—these aren’t things you can easily brush off.
Trying to deny your feelings for Luke doesn’t change the reality of the situation. Your reactions and behaviour make it clear to all of us what you’re trying to ignore. We see through the act of nonchalance you’re putting on. It’s not just a case of mild interest; it’s something deeper. We can tell that you’re emotionally invested, even if you’re not ready to admit it to yourself.
It’s time to face the truth about your emotions. The more you try to suppress or deny them, the more obvious it becomes to everyone around you. There’s no need to hide or pretend anymore."
Taylor says before walking off.
I keep convincing myself that nothing will come of this, and that denying my feelings will make it all go away. I’m certain that nothing will happen between us, and so I refuse to acknowledge my true emotions.
Despite my best efforts to conceal my feelings, it's becoming increasingly difficult to ignore them. I try to pretend otherwise, but my actions and reactions betray me. Deep down, I think I’m in love, but I can’t bring myself to say it.
You're way off base (Shoo-doo, shoo-doo) I won't say it (She won't say it, no) Get off my case (Sha-da, sha-da) I won't say it (Ooh-ooh-ooh)
I’m adamant about not admitting my feelings. It’s a protective mechanism to avoid vulnerability and potential heartache. I want to be left alone to keep my emotions private.
Girl, go be proud It's okay, you're in love
Admitting my feelings would mean exposing myself to the possibility of heartache, and I’m not ready to take that risk. The emotional turmoil that follows when feelings aren’t reciprocated, or when they lead to disappointment, is something I’m determined to avoid. I’ve learned from past experiences that letting my guard down can lead to deep, sometimes overwhelming pain. By keeping my feelings to myself, I maintain a sense of control and safety, shielding my heart from potential harm.
I want to be left alone to keep my emotions private because it feels like the only way to maintain my emotional stability. Sharing my feelings would mean inviting scrutiny and potentially having to navigate the complexities of another person’s reactions and responses. It’s easier to keep everything internal, to process my emotions in solitude where I can control the narrative and avoid the unpredictability of others' reactions.
This private handling of my emotions is a means of self-preservation. It’s my way of creating a barrier between myself and the risk of emotional pain. The prospect of vulnerability, of exposing my inner thoughts and feelings, is daunting and unsettling. So, I prefer to keep my emotions hidden, managing them in the confines of my own mind where I can protect myself from the uncertainty and potential hurt that comes with opening up to others.
However, Taylor did not agree with my choices.
"Listen, Y/N, it’s really important for you to understand something: it’s completely okay to embrace your feelings. Love, as complicated and intimidating as it can be, is not something to be ashamed of or to hide from.
You deserve to be happy. If you have feelings for Luke, acknowledging them doesn’t make you weak or foolish—it makes you human.
There’s no shame in being vulnerable; it’s a sign of strength and courage. It’s a step towards allowing yourself to experience love and all the happiness that can come with it.
Hiding from your feelings or pretending they don’t exist only prolongs the emotional struggle and prevents you from fully engaging with the positive aspects of life."
"Yeah, whatever Tay, I'll see you later."
She raises her eyes at me, noticing I don't tell her to shut up about the topic.
At least, out loud I won't say I'm in love
It feels ridiculous to admit that I might be in love. I’ve convinced myself that I don’t need a man to be happy and that I’m fine on my own. Declaring my feelings feels like an invitation to heartbreak, something I’ve vowed to avoid.
I do have feelings for Luke. I’ve come to realise that I am in love with him, but I can't bring myself to openly acknowledge it. I’ll keep these emotions to myself, hidden away where I can manage them privately.
Who knows, maybe one day I'll tell him?
Doubt it.
How each character from Percy Jackson might confess their love to you:
Percy Jackson
Percy would likely be straightforward but a bit nervous, possibly choosing a relaxed, meaningful setting to make it special.
“So, I’ve been thinking a lot lately... and I’ve realized that I really care about you. More than just as a friend. I want to be with you, if you’ll have me.”
Annabeth Chase
Annabeth would likely plan a thoughtful moment, perhaps during a meaningful activity or after a deep conversation. She’d be sincere and direct but with a touch of her intellectual charm.
“I’ve been thinking about us a lot. We work so well together, and I’ve come to realize that I have feelings for you. I don’t want to just be friends anymore. I want to be something more.”
Luke Castellan
Luke would be passionate and straightforward, often in a way that reflects his rebellious nature. He might make a grand gesture or choose an exciting moment to reveal his feelings.
“I know I’m not always the best at this kind of thing, but I can’t keep it in anymore. I’m in love with you. I want to be with you, no matter what happens.”
Clarisse La Rue
Clarisse would be blunt and honest, expressing her feelings with a straightforward approach. It might not be overly romantic, but it would be heartfelt and genuine.
“Listen, I’m not good with all the mushy stuff, but I want you to know that I really care about you. I’ve been thinking about us a lot, and I’m falling for you. I want us to be together.”
Thalia Grace
Thalia would be direct but sincere, possibly confessing her feelings during a quiet moment or after a shared adventure. She’d be confident but genuine.
“You know, I’ve been thinking about how much I enjoy spending time with you. I’ve realized that my feelings for you are stronger than just friendship. I want to be with you, if you feel the same.”
Nico di Angelo
Nico would likely be introspective and a bit nervous, choosing a quiet, intimate setting to open up about his feelings. His confession would be heartfelt and sincere.
“I know I’m not always the easiest person to be around, but I can’t keep this to myself anymore. I have deep feelings for you. I’m falling in love with you, and I hope you feel the same.”
Jason Grace
Jason would be confident and respectful, possibly during a calm moment or after a significant event. His approach would be sincere and considerate of your feelings.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about us and what we mean to each other. I’ve come to realize that I have strong feelings for you. I care about you deeply and would love to be more than just friends.”
Hazel Levesque
Hazel would be gentle and heartfelt, possibly in a setting that feels serene or reflective. She’d express her emotions with sincerity and vulnerability.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about us and how much I value our time together. I’ve realized that I have feelings for you that go beyond friendship. I’d really like us to be together, if you’re open to it.”
Piper McLean
Piper would be charming and sincere, often making her confession during a sweet or romantic moment. Her approach would be warm and emotionally expressive.
“I’ve been wanting to tell you something for a while now. I’ve realized that my feelings for you have grown into something deeper. I’m in love with you, and I hope you feel the same way.”
Dating Luke Castellan would include:
Luke is incredibly charismatic. From the moment you start dating, you’d be drawn to his easygoing nature and the way he can make you feel like the most important person in the world
he’s smooth with words and knows how to make you smile, even when things get tough.
as the son of Hermes, Luke thrives on adventure. He’d take you on spontaneous trips, sneaking out of camp to explore new places or pulling you into some mischief. Life with Luke would never be boring; he’d keep you on your toes with his unpredictability and love for the thrill of the unknown.
Luke has a strong sense of loyalty, especially to those he cares about.
he’d be protective of you, always looking out for your safety and well-being.
however, this loyalty can sometimes be double-edged, as Luke’s internal conflicts could lead him to make decisions that he believes are for the greater good, even if they hurt those closest to him.
as his partner, you’d see the darker sides of his personality—the resentment, anger, and doubt that he tries to hide from others.
there would be times when he’d pull away, lost in his own thoughts, or when his internal struggles would cause tension between you. Understanding and patience would be crucial in these moments.
despite his tough exterior, Luke has a vulnerable side that he rarely shows. With you, he might open up about his past, his fears, and his dreams. These moments of vulnerability would be rare and precious, showing how much he trusts you.
it would take time for him to fully let his guard down, but when he does, it would deepen your connection.
Luke is smart and strategic, always thinking a few steps ahead. He’d enjoy deep conversations about mythology, the flaws of the gods, and his ideas for change. He’d challenge your perspectives and encourage you to think critically, which could lead to some intense but stimulating discussions.
Luke’s sense of right and wrong is complicated. He genuinely believes in what he’s fighting for, even if his methods are questionable. Dating him would mean grappling with moral gray areas, as you might not always agree with his choices.
this could create tension, but it would also force you to confront your own beliefs and values.
Luke’s caring nature might not always be obvious, but it’s there. He’d show his affection through small acts of kindness, like fixing something for you, making sure you’re comfortable, or sharing something important to him.
he might struggle with expressing his emotions directly, but his actions would speak volumes.
Luke is ambitious and driven by a desire to change the world. This ambition can sometimes make him single-minded, focusing on his goals to the detriment of his personal relationships.
dating Luke would be a mix of love and heartache. He’d love you deeply, but his internal struggles and the path he’s chosen might pull him away from you at times. There’d be moments of intense closeness, but also periods of distance and conflict. You’d need to be strong to stand by him, especially as his choices lead him down a darker path.
at his core, Luke is not a bad person—he’s a deeply wounded one. There might be moments when you glimpse the possibility of redemption in him, when he questions his actions and reconsiders his choices. Your love could be a guiding light, helping him find his way back to the person he once was, or it might be the anchor that holds him steady in his darkest moments.
being with Luke would be an emotional rollercoaster. The highs would be exhilarating, full of adventure, passion, and connection. But the lows could be devastating, as his inner demons and the consequences of his choices come to the forefront.
it would take a lot of patience, understanding, and strength to navigate the complexities of loving someone like Luke Castellan.
your relationship would constantly be tested by external pressures, internal conflicts, and the looming shadow of Luke’s plans.
In the end, dating Luke Castellan would be a journey of love, loss, and the constant storm between light and darkness. But if you can weather these storms together, your bond would be one forged in fire—strong, resilient, and capable of withstanding anything.
Dating Clarisse La Rue would include:
you’d be her top priority. she’d go to great lengths to keep you safe, expect her to step in and defend you without a second thought if she feels you’re being threatened or disrespected.
in public Clarisse comes across as tough and abrasive, but in private, she defo has a soft spot for you.
she might struggle to express her emotions with words, but her actions will speak volumes. she’ll show her affection through small gestures—like making sure you’re comfortable, sharing things she cares about, or simply being there when you need her.
forget the usual dinner-and-a-movie routine—dating Clarisse means going on adrenaline-pumping adventures. She’ll take you on hikes, sparring sessions, and quests that test your limits and bring you closer together
Clarisse values strength, and that doesn’t just mean physical power. She respects you for your own unique strengths, whether they’re in combat, intellect, or something else entirely.
even though she knows most people are scared of her, she’d expect you to stand your ground and not back down, even when she’s in one of her fiery moods. In return, she’ll respect your boundaries and opinions, even if she doesn’t always agree with them.
Clarisse might not be the most affectionate person, but she shows she cares in ways that are meaningful to her. she’ll remember small details, like your favorite weapon to use or how you like your armor polished. she’ll share her victories with you and might even let you in on her vulnerabilities, which she doesn’t show to just anyone.
training would be a big part of your relationship. Clarisse would love to train with you, not just because she enjoys a good fight, but because it’s one of the ways she connects with people. She’d push you to be your best, but she’d also be there to pick you up when you fall.
in rare, quiet moments, you’d get to see a side of Clarisse that she keeps hidden from most people. She might cuddle with you after a long day, offer you her jacket when it’s cold, or share a quiet conversation by the campfire. These moments are precious because they show how much she trusts you.
Clarisse would be incredibly proud of your achievements. Whether you win a battle, complete a difficult quest, or just have a personal victory, she’d be the first to acknowledge it, even if it’s in her own understated way. You might get a nod, a pat on the back, or a quiet “Well done,” but coming from her, it means the world.
Clarisse’s temper can be a challenge. She’s quick to anger, especially when she feels someone she cares about is being hurt. While she’s working on managing her anger, there will be times when it flares up. It’s important to understand that her anger isn’t directed at you, and with time, she’ll learn to communicate better.
despite the challenges, dating Clarisse would forge an incredibly strong bond between the two of you. she’d be your partner in every sense of the word—someone you can rely on, fight alongside, and share your victories and losses with. Once you’ve earned her love, it’s a love that will stand the test of time and any trials you might face together.
That way
Clarisse La Rue x Reader
Someone asked for a part two of 'She likes a boy' but from Y/n's POV, so here it is!
she likes a boy - pt 1
enjoy! :)
that way - tate mcrae
✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿✿❀✿
Y/N had always thought she was straight. Boys had always been her thing—crushes on cute classmates, daydreaming about first dates, and obsessing over the latest teen heartthrob. It was simple, easy, and something she never questioned. But lately, things had started to feel... different. The difference was Clarisse, her best friend. They had been inseparable for as long as she could remember, always laughing, always in sync. But now, something had shifted.
Run me in circles
Clarisse was running her in circles, playing with her emotions in a way that Y/N couldn’t quite grasp.
Like you always do
Y/N found herself clinging to every word, every look, every moment with Clarisse, even though it made her feel like she was losing her grip on reality.
Mess with me on purpose
She would tease Y/N, flirt with her in that subtle, almost unnoticeable way that left Y/N feeling dizzy and confused. It wasn’t like the harmless jokes they used to share. There was something else in Clarisse’s eyes now, something that made Y/N’s heart race, even though she didn’t want it to.
So I'll hang onto you
Why keep me around if this is just a game? Y/N wondered.
I know what you mean when you act like that
She knew Clarisse’s history with girls, the way she would effortlessly draw them in, only to let them go when she got bored.
You don't know it's breaking my heart
But this was different—this was her best friend.
Said that it was just never gonna happen
Then almost kissed me in the dark
Y/N could pinpoint the exact moment everything changed between them. It was one of those nights when they were alone together, the kind that used to be so easy and comfortable. But this time was different. The room was dim, the atmosphere charged with something unspoken. They were sitting close, closer than usual, and Y/N could feel the heat radiating off Clarisse’s skin.
They had been laughing about something silly when suddenly, the laughter faded, and the mood shifted. Clarisse had leaned in, her face inches from Y/N’s, and for a moment, it felt like time stopped.
Y/N remembered the way her heart pounded in her chest, the way her breath hitched as Clarisse’s lips hovered so close to hers. It was just a moment—a fleeting, almost kiss in the dark—but it had left Y/N reeling. Did it mean anything to Clarisse? Because it meant something to her, and that terrified her.
Every time we talk, it just hurts so bad
Since then, every time they talked, it just hurt so bad. The easy, carefree conversations they used to have were now replaced with awkward silences and unspoken tension.
'Cause I don't even know what we are
I don't even know where to start
What were they now? Were they even still friends, or had everything changed without Y/N realizing it? She didn’t know where to start, didn’t know how to bring it up, so she just played the part.
But I can play the part
She pretended that everything was fine, that it meant nothing, even though it was tearing her apart inside.
We say we're friends, but I'm catching you across the room
They still called themselves best friends, but Y/N caught Clarisse looking at her across the room in a way that friends shouldn’t. Or maybe it was her—maybe it was the way she was looking at Clarisse that wasn’t how friends should. Y/N felt something shift inside her, a longing she didn’t want to acknowledge, but couldn’t ignore.
It makes no sense, 'cause we're fighting over what we do
It made no sense. They were always fighting lately, snapping at each other over stupid things, like how Y/N was spending too much time with other people, or how Clarisse was being too distant.
And there's no way that I'll end up being with you
It wasn’t like them to argue, but the fights always ended with the same thought running through Y/N’s mind: There’s no way that I’ll end up being with you.
But friends don't look at friends that way
But if that was true, why did it hurt so much? Why did it feel like she was losing something every time they argued? Friends don’t look at friends that way, Y/N thought, but she couldn’t stop herself.
Friends don't look at friends that way
She couldn’t stop wondering if maybe—just maybe—there was something more between them.
Can't even tell if I love or hate you more
Y/N had always thought she had it all figured out. She was the kind of girl who had her eyes set on boys—crushes, dates, and the occasional heartbreak. It was a pattern she was used to, a routine she could rely on. But lately, her feelings had been anything but reliable. Clarisse, had been turning her world upside down, and Y/N couldn’t tell if she loved or hated her for it.
You've got me addicted
Clarisse had always been flirtatious, especially with girls, and Y/N knew her friend’s history well.
And I can't tell who's keeping score
I know what you mean when you act like that
She knew how Clarisse could draw someone in with a glance, how she could make anyone feel special, only to leave them behind when her interest waned.
You don't know it's breaking my heart
It was something Y/N had seen countless times, but it had never been directed at her—until now. Now, Clarisse was flirting with her, teasing her in ways that left Y/N feeling breathless and confused. It was like she was addicted, unable to stop thinking about Clarisse, even though it was driving her crazy.
Said that it was just never gonna happen
Then almost kissed me in the dark
But that night that we almost kissed one night, or i thought it was an almost kiss, did it mean anything to you? I think i meant something to me
Clarisse had leaned in, her face inches from Y/N’s, and for a split second, Y/N thought they were going to kiss. Her heart pounded in her chest, her breath catching in her throat. But just as quickly, Clarisse pulled back, leaving Y/N reeling, unsure if the moment had even been real.
Did it mean anything to Clarisse? Y/N kept asking herself that question, over and over. To her, it had meant everything. It had opened up a flood of feelings she didn’t know how to handle. Every time they talked after that, it hurt. The easy conversations they used to have were gone, replaced by awkward silences and painful reminders of what had almost happened.
Every time we talk, it just hurts so bad
Y/N didn’t know how to talk to Clarisse anymore. They used to be able to talk about anything, but now every word felt heavy, loaded with unspoken emotions.
'Cause I don't even know what we are
Were they still friends? It didn’t feel like it. Something had shifted, and Y/N didn’t know how to fix it. She wanted to ask Clarisse what they were, what they had become, but she didn’t even know where to start.
I don't even know where to start
But I can play the part
Instead, she played the part. She pretended that everything was fine, that she wasn’t falling apart inside. She told herself that the almost-kiss didn’t mean anything, that she was still the same girl who liked boys and nothing more. But it was getting harder and harder to believe that lie.
We say we're friends, but I'm catching you across the room
Whenever they were in a room together, Y/N found herself catching Clarisse’s eyes across the room. There was something in the way Clarisse looked at her, something Y/N couldn’t quite place. It wasn’t the look of a friend, but it wasn’t something she could easily define either. It made her heart race and her mind spin. It made her question everything she thought she knew about herself.
She started noticing things she had never noticed before—the way Clarisse would watch her when she was talking to a guy, the way her expression would darken just slightly, like she was judging Y/N for being with someone else. It didn’t make any sense. Why would Clarisse care? They were best friends, nothing more. But then why did it feel like there was something more lurking beneath the surface?
It makes no sense, 'cause we're fighting over what we do
They started fighting more often, over stupid things that never used to matter. Clarisse would get annoyed when Y/N mentioned going out with a guy, and Y/N would snap back, confused and frustrated by the mixed signals she was getting. It wasn’t like them to fight, and it scared Y/N how easily their friendship seemed to be unraveling.
And there's no way that I'll end up being with you
But every time they fought, that same thought crept into Y/N’s mind: There’s no way that I’ll end up being with you. It was a truth she clung to, even though it hurt. They were never going to be together, so why did it feel like her heart was breaking every time they argued?
But friends don't look at friends that way
Friends don't look at friends that way
Friends don't look at friends that way
Friends don't look at friends that way
Friends don’t look at friends that way, Y/N reminded herself. But the way Clarisse looked at her, and the way Y/N found herself looking back, wasn’t the way friends were supposed to look at each other.
Mm-mm, ayy
We say we're friends, but I'm catching you across the room
Whenever i'm with i guy, i feel you looking at me, judging me, like i shouldn't be with him.
It makes no sense, 'cause we're fighting over what we do
It made no sense. They were always fighting lately, snapping at each other over stupid things, like how Y/N was spending too much time with other people, or how Clarisse was being too distant.
And there's no way that I'll end up being with you
The same thought kept repeating through Y/N’s mind: There’s no way that I’ll end up being with you.
But friends don't look at friends that way
But if that was true, why did it hurt so much? Why did it feel like she was losing something every time they argued? Friends don’t look at friends that way, Y/N thought, but she couldn’t stop herself.
Friends don't look at friends that way
So are we not friends? Could we ever be something more?
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One day, it all became too much. They were hanging out at Y/N’s cabin,the first time in a while it had been just them. Clarisse had been going over to capture the flag techniques and only trusted Y/n to help, but the tension between them was suffocating. Y/N couldn’t focus on the plans; all she could think about was Clarisse sitting next to her, close enough to touch, but feeling miles away. Finally, she couldn’t take it anymore.
“Clarisse,” Y/N said, her voice trembling with frustration. “Why are we doing this? Why are we pretending like everything’s okay when it’s not? Why do you keep messing with me?”
Clarisse looked at her, surprised by the outburst, but she didn’t say anything. Y/N took a deep breath and continued. “You flirt with me, you ignore me whenever I go out with guys, and then you act like nothing happen. I can’t keep doing this. I don’t even know if we’re still friends.”
Clarisse’s eyes softened, and for the first time in weeks, Y/N saw the old Clarisse, the one she had always been able to talk to. “I’m sorry,” Clarisse said quietly. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just... I didn’t know how to tell you.”
“Tell me what?” Y/N asked, her heart pounding in her chest.
“That I- that.. you. Fuck it, Y/n, I like you,” Clarisse admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’ve liked you for a long time, but I didn’t want to ruin what we have. I thought you only liked boys, so I tried to keep it to myself. But seeing you, with a boy, knowing it should be me, I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to tell you, I’m sorry.”
Y/N felt her breath catch in her throat. “I thought I only liked boys too,” she whispered, the truth finally coming out. “But then you... Clarisse, you’ve been driving me crazy. I can’t stop thinking about you, and it’s scaring me because I don’t know what any of this means.”
Clarisse reached out, hesitating for a moment before taking Y/N’s hand. “Maybe we don’t have to figure it out right now,” she said softly. “Maybe we can just see where this goes.”
Y/N looked at her, really looked at her, and felt something inside her finally click into place. “I think I’d like that,” she said, a small smile tugging at her lips.
Clarisse smiled back, the tension between them melting away. She leaned in slowly, giving Y/N plenty of time to pull back if she wanted to. But Y/N didn’t pull back. This time, when Clarisse’s lips met hers, it wasn’t almost. It was real, and it was everything Y/N hadn’t known she needed.
When they finally pulled apart, Y/N felt lighter, the weight of confusion and doubt lifting off her shoulders. She looked into Clarisse’s eyes and saw nothing but warmth and honesty.
“Friends don’t look at friends that way,” Y/N said with a grin, echoing the words that had been haunting her for so long.
Clarisse laughed softly, her fingers still intertwined with Y/N’s. “No, they don’t,” she agreed. “But I don’t think we’re just friends anymore.”
Y/N smiled, leaning her head against Clarisse’s shoulder, finally at peace with where they were headed. “Yeah,” she whispered. “We’re something more.”
masterlist!!
all of my posts in one place so it maes it easier :)
Clarisse La Rue:
waiting for you you find peace in your troubled relationship one night with someone you never thought you would.
she likes a boy Clarisse likes Y/N, Y/N likes a boy, Clarisse is not a boy.
that way Clarisse likes Y/N, Y/N could never like Clarisse, they're just friends? Right?
what if i hurt you? Clarisse loves y/n, more than anything, which is why one day when she almost gets hurt, clarisse knows, she might not be best for y/n.
Dating Clarisse La Rue would include small summary of what it would be like if you were in a relationship with Clarisse.
Luke Castellan:
Dating Luke Castellan would include small summary of what it would be like if you were in a relationship with Luke.
What if I hurt you
Clarisse La Rue x Reader
Clarisse loves y/n, more thant anything, which is why one day when she almost gets hurt, clarisse knows that she might not be best for y/n
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Y/n had never been one to attract much attention. She was the kind of person who liked to blend into the background, not causing too much fuss. That’s part of why she loved Clarisse La Rue so much; the daughter of Ares was the complete opposite. Bold, brash, and fiercely protective, Clarisse made Y/n feel like she could conquer anything, even if Y/n preferred to do so quietly. Their relationship had blossomed over the past year, surprising both of them with how deeply they had come to care for each other.
But lately, things hadn’t been so perfect. Y/n was being harassed by a guy named Trey, a son of Hermes who had been relentless in his pursuit of her. It had started off innocently enough, just a few flirtatious comments here and there. Y/n had brushed them off, not wanting to make a big deal out of it. She figured Trey would lose interest eventually, especially if she didn’t encourage him.
But she was wrong.
It began with small things, like Trey showing up wherever Y/n happened to be. At first, it was just a coincidence—he’d be at the training grounds when she was practicing archery, or at the dining pavilion when she was grabbing a quick bite. But soon it became clear that Trey was intentionally seeking her out. He’d “accidentally” bump into her and make some remark about how fate was bringing them together. Y/n would laugh it off, trying to stay polite, but inside she was growing more uncomfortable by the day.
One day, Y/n was in the library, enjoying the quiet solitude that allowed her to immerse herself in a book. But just as she was getting lost in the pages, Trey appeared at her table, sliding into the chair across from her with a wide grin.
“Hey, Y/n,” he said, leaning in a little too close. “What are you reading? Something romantic, I bet.”
Y/n suppressed a sigh, keeping her voice even. “Just a history book. You know, nothing special.”
“Oh, I bet you’d like something more exciting,” Trey replied, winking at her. “Maybe I could take you out sometime? Show you a real good time.”
Y/n’s stomach twisted with discomfort, but she forced a polite smile. “Thanks, Trey, but I’m not interested. I’m with Clarisse, remember?”
Trey’s smile didn’t waver. “Yeah, I know. But come on, you can do better than her. I mean, you’re so sweet and gentle, and she’s… well, you know. Rough around the edges.”
Y/n’s polite façade cracked a little, her voice sharpening. “Clarisse is amazing, and I’m very happy with her. Please stop.”
But Trey didn’t stop. He showed up at her cabin, offering to “walk her to dinner.” He’d corner her after training, complimenting her on how she was “way too cute” for someone like Clarisse. Y/n tried everything—ignoring him, being direct, even getting other campers to tell him to back off. Nothing worked. And through it all, Y/n didn’t tell Clarisse.
Why didn’t she? Part of it was pride—Y/n didn’t want to seem weak, like she couldn’t handle things on her own. But a bigger part of it was fear. She knew how Clarisse could be, especially when someone threatened someone she loved. Clarisse’s temper was legendary, and Y/n didn’t want to see her girlfriend get into trouble because of some jerk who didn’t know how to take a hint.
But it all came to a head one afternoon when Y/n and Clarisse were hanging out by the lake. It was a rare moment of peace for them—Clarisse was always so busy with her duties as a senior camper, and Y/n cherished the times when they could just be together. They sat on a blanket, Clarisse’s arm slung casually around Y/n’s shoulders as they watched the sun glitter on the water.
“This is nice,” Y/n murmured, leaning into Clarisse’s side. “I wish we could do this more often.”
“Me too,” Clarisse agreed, her voice softer than usual. “It’s just—”
Before Clarisse could finish her sentence, one of the Ares campers came jogging over, looking a little frantic. “Clarisse! Wylan won’t give me my sword back, tell him he has to. It’s my lucky one!”
Clarisse groaned, clearly irritated at being interrupted, but she was duty-bound. She kissed Y/n’s temple. “I’ll be right back, babe. Don’t move a muscle, okay?”
Y/n smiled, though it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “I’ll be here.”
As Clarisse jogged off, Y/n sighed and pulled out her book, trying to enjoy the peace and quiet. But of course, it didn’t last long.
“Hey, Y/n!” Trey’s voice cut through the serene atmosphere like a knife. Y/n looked up, her heart sinking as she saw him striding towards her, that same smirk plastered on his face.
“Trey,” she said, her voice resigned. “Please, not now.”
“Aw, come on,” Trey replied, plopping down on the blanket beside her without an invitation. “You always say that. Why not now? It’s a beautiful day, and I’m here with a beautiful girl.”
Y/n scooted away from him, feeling her patience wearing dangerously thin. “Trey, I’m serious. You need to stop this. I’m with Clarisse, and I’m not interested in you.”
Trey leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a low, sleazy whisper. “But why not, Y/n? I could treat you so much better than she does. She’s all about fighting and yelling, but me? I’d be gentle. I’d take care of you.” His hand travels upwards, starting to play with her hair.
Y/n’s heart raced with a mix of fear and anger. Pushing his hands off and scotting back further, she opened her mouth to tell him off, to really let him have it this time, but before she could get a word out, a voice boomed from behind them.
“WHAT IN THE HADES IS GOING ON HERE?”
Y/n whipped her head around to see Clarisse standing a few feet away, her eyes blazing with fury. She had returned much faster than Y/n expected, and the look on her face sent a chill down Y/n’s spine.
“Clarisse,” Y/n started, but she didn’t get far.
Clarisse marched over, her fists clenched. “Trey, what the hell are you doing?”
Trey had the nerve to grin, though there was a flicker of fear in his eyes. “Just talking to Y/n, that’s all.”
Clarisse’s expression darkened, and she stepped closer, looming over Trey. “Talking to her? It sure as hell looked like you were harassing her.”
“Harassing? Come on, Clarisse, don’t be so dramatic,” Trey said, trying to play it off. “I was just—”
“Shut up,” Clarisse snarled. “You think I didn’t hear what you just said? You think Y/n would be better off with you?” She grabbed Trey by the front of his shirt, yanking him to his feet. “She’s with me. And if you ever try to get between us again, I’ll make sure you regret it.”
Trey’s bravado finally cracked. “Whoa, hey, Clarisse, chill. I didn’t mean any harm—”
“Didn’t mean any harm?” Clarisse interrupted, her voice dangerously low. “You’ve been following her around, making her uncomfortable, and you think I’m just going to let that slide?”
“Clarisse,” Y/n said softly, reaching out to touch her arm. “It’s okay, I can handle it.”
But Clarisse was beyond reasoning. She shoved Trey back, causing him to stumble. “You don't lay a finger on her. Not now, not ever.”
Trey, clearly not as smart as he thought he was, decided to push back. “Maybe Y/n doesn’t want to be with someone like you. Maybe she needs someone who’s not so… rough.”
That did it. Clarisse’s fist connected with Trey’s jaw before Y/n could even blink. Trey yelped in pain, staggering backward, but Clarisse didn’t stop. She grabbed him by the collar, ready to hit him again.
“Clarisse, stop!” Y/n cried, trying to pull her back. “Please, stop!”
But Clarisse was lost in her rage. Her fist swung again, this time landing squarely on Trey’s gut, knocking the wind out of him. Trey crumpled to the ground, gasping for air, but Clarisse wasn’t done. She raised her fist again, but before she could strike, Y/n stepped in, grabbing her arm.
“Clarisse, stop! You’re going to kill him!”
Clarisse froze, her fist still poised in the air. Moving to hit again, she turned to look at Y/n, her eyes wild with anger. But when she saw the fear in Y/n’s eyes, something inside her snapped back to reality. She lowered her fist, breathing heavily, and Trey took the opportunity to scramble to his feet, clutching his stomach.
“You’re crazy!” Trey spat, backing away. “This isn’t over, La Rue.”
“Get out of here before I finish what I started,” Clarisse growled, but her voice lacked the same venom as before.
Trey didn’t need to be told twice. He turned and ran, disappearing into the trees. For a moment, there was only the sound of Clarisse’s heavy breathing and Y/n’s pounding heart.
Then, Clarisse turned to Y/n, her face paling as she realized what had just happened. “Y/n, I—”
But before she could finish, Y/n wrapped her arms around her, burying her face in Clarisse’s chest. “I was so scared,” Y/n whispered, her voice trembling.
Clarisse’s arms went around her automatically, but there was a stiffness to her embrace, a hesitation that Y/n hadn’t felt before. “I’m sorry,” Clarisse said, her voice thick with guilt. “I should’ve— I didn’t mean to scare you.”
Y/n shook her head, clinging to Clarisse. “I don’t care about that. I just didn’t want you to get hurt.”
Clarisse pulled back slightly, looking down at Y/n with pained eyes. “But I did hurt you, didn’t I? Not physically, but… Y/n, I’m so sorry.”
Y/n looked up at her, confused. “What are you talking about? You didn’t hurt me.”
Clarisse’s gaze dropped to the ground. “I almost lost control, Y/n. I could’ve hurt you by accident. I could’ve—”
“But you didn’t,” Y/n interrupted, tightening her grip on Clarisse. “You stopped. And even if you hadn’t, I know you would never hurt me on purpose.”
Clarisse’s hands trembled as she cupped Y/n’s face. “I never want to hurt you. Ever. But… but what if I do? What if I can’t control it next time?”
“There won’t be a next time,” Y/n said firmly. “You’re not a monster, Clarisse. You’re my hero. You protected me.”
Clarisse shook her head, tears welling up in her eyes. “I don’t deserve you.”
“Yes, you do,” Y/n insisted, standing on her tiptoes to press a kiss to Clarisse’s lips. “I love you, Clarisse. All of you. Even the parts that scare you.”
Clarisse’s breath hitched, and she kissed Y/n back, a desperate, tender kiss that spoke of all the fear and love tangled inside her. When they finally pulled apart, Clarisse rested her forehead against Y/n’s. “I love you too. So much.”
They stood there for a long time, holding each other as the sun set behind them. Eventually, Clarisse pulled away, her eyes still haunted by what had happened. “I think… I think I need some time alone.”
Y/n’s heart sank, but she nodded. “Okay. But promise me you’ll come back?”
Clarisse managed a small, sad smile. “I promise.”
As Clarisse walked away, Y/n watched her go, a knot of worry tightening in her chest. She knew Clarisse was struggling with her anger, with the fear that she might one day lose control. But Y/n also knew that their love was stronger than any fear.
For the next few days, Clarisse avoided Y/n. She threw herself into training, into her duties, into anything that kept her away from the person she loved most. Y/n tried to reach out, but Clarisse always found an excuse to keep her distance. It was agonizing, but Y/n refused to give up. She knew that Clarisse was trying to protect her, but what Clarisse didn’t realize was that by pulling away, she was hurting Y/n even more.
Finally, after almost a week of silence, Y/n decided she’d had enough. She marched over to the Ares cabin, ignoring the wary looks from the other campers, and knocked on the door.
Clarisse opened it, and the moment she saw Y/n standing there, she looked like she might close it again. But Y/n quickly stepped inside, blocking her from shutting the door.
“Clarisse, we need to talk,” Y/n said, her voice firm.
Clarisse sighed, running a hand through her messy hair. “Y/n, I—”
“No,” Y/n interrupted, her eyes flashing with determination. “You don’t get to push me away like this. I know you’re scared, but you don’t have to be. I’m not going anywhere.”
Clarisse looked at her, the walls she’d built around herself starting to crumble. “But what if I hurt you?”
“You won’t,” Y/n said, taking Clarisse’s hands in hers. “And even if you did, I’d still love you. You’re not your dad, Clarisse. You’re not Ares. You’re you, and that’s who I fell in love with.”
Clarisse’s shoulders slumped, and she pulled Y/n into a tight embrace, burying her face in Y/n’s hair. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, her voice choked with emotion. “I’m so sorry for everything.”
Y/n hugged her back just as tightly. “It’s okay. We’ll get through this together.”
Clarisse nodded, holding Y/n like she was afraid to let go. And in that moment, Y/n knew that they were going to be okay. Their love was strong enough to withstand anything, even the darkest parts of themselves.
And from that day forward, Clarisse vowed to never let her fear drive a wedge between them again. She worked on her anger, on her need to protect Y/n without pushing her away. It wasn’t easy, but Y/n was always there, her unwavering support giving Clarisse the strength to keep going.
Together, they were unstoppable.
She likes a boy
Clarisse likes Y/N, Y/N likes a boy, Clarisse is not a boy.
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At 14 Katy talked about teenage dreams On the bus and she's looking at me
Clarisse and Y/N were both 14, sitting on Clarisse’s bed in the Ares cabin, their heads full of dreams and chatter about what the future might hold. They were best friends, inseparable since Y/N had gotten to Camp Half Blood, quite an unexpected duo to be honest, Clarisse the daughter of Ares was impulsive, always up for a fight, angry at the world. Whereas Y/N was the opposite, she was calm, patient, no one understood how those two were such close friends. Sharing everything from secrets to their latest obsessions, Y/N about her pair of new shoes, Clarisse watched her with a fond smile, her heart squeezing in a way that only happened when she was around Y/N.
Talking about life and her dog and the boys that she likes I ask "Have you got someone in mind?"
They spent hours talking about their lives, their families, their hopes. Y/N talked about her dog, a scruffy mutt who followed her everywhere, and the boys she had crushes on back at her old school. Clarisse listened intently, nodding and asking questions, even as her stomach twisted at the mention of boys.
“So, do you have someone in mind here?” Clarisse asked, trying to keep her voice casual, even though she dreaded the answer.
He's at the all-boys school She says something about liking his height Suddenly worried about mine
Y/N’s eyes lit up. “Yeah, there’s this guy James. He’s in the Hephaestus Cabin, he is so cute.”
Clarisse’s heart sank a little. She knew James, a tall, lanky boy with a loud demeanor. Y/N had always liked tall guys. “He’s so tall,” Y/N continued dreamily, “I just love how he towers over everyone. I don’t know, it’s just... nice.”
Clarisse suddenly felt a pang of insecurity about her own height. She wasn’t short, but she wasn’t tall like James either. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, trying to push the thoughts away.
بياخد مخدرات
و هوا بيتعلم سواقة
بيقضي وقت معها
As Y/N gushed about James, Clarisse couldn’t help but notice how different he was from the person Y/N thought he was. James was older, a bit rough around the edges, and there were rumors that he was into things that weren’t exactly legal. Clarisse had heard that he was learning how to drive already and that he spent a lot of time hanging out with older guys who had already left camp. Y/N, though, was oblivious, caught up in the idea of who James could be, rather than who he really was.
Lately, Y/N had been spending more time with James, and Clarisse found herself feeling more and more left out. They used to spend all their time together, but now it was like Y/N had drifted into a different world, one where Clarisse didn’t belong.
She likes a boy, she likes a boy She likes a boy, she likes a boy I'm not a boy, I'm not a boy I'm not a- Accustomed to making a move
Clarisse found herself caught between two worlds. On one hand, she wanted to support her best friend, to be there for Y/N no matter what. On the other, she was drowning in feelings she didn’t know how to deal with.
No one knew Clarisse like Y/N did, she couldn’t ruin that. She couldn’t make a move on Y/N, right?
مش ھاقدراشرح
She had never felt this way before, certainly not for a girl. It was all new, confusing, and more intense than anything she had ever experienced.
Why I'm feeling the way that I do
Clarisse couldn’t explain it, not even to herself. She was used to being in control, used to having things go her way. But these feelings were foreign, and they made her feel vulnerable in a way she hated. Every time she saw Y/N with another boy, she felt a flash of anger, a wave of jealousy that she didn’t know how to deal with.
I like a boy. Y/N’s voice echoed in Clarisse’s head. But Clarisse wasn’t a boy. And that was the problem.
احساس جدید لیا
She had never had trouble going after what she wanted, whether it was winning a game of capture the flag or getting the last slice of pizza from her older brothers. But this—this was different. She was scared. Scared to make a move, scared to ruin the friendship that meant everything to her.
She's half-Greek with a pretty face Strawberry lip gloss, oh, it's wasted
She’s Aphrodite’s daughter, she’s the most gorgeous girl at camp, of course those guys wanted her, Clarisse thought bitterly, watching Y/N apply her strawberry lip gloss in the mirror. Clarisse knew however it would just end up on some other guy's lips, wasted.
On this dumb boy who likes the chase But why am I so angry in the first place? Why am I hurting?
Y/N was beautiful, and it wasn’t just Clarisse who noticed. Boys were always hanging around, trying to get her attention. But Y/N wasn’t interested in any of them for long. She liked the chase, but she never let things go further than a kiss or two.
Why was this girl hurting Clarisse so much, Clarisse knew nothing would happen, why can’t she get over it.
Eventually pain turned to anger, Clarisse would train more, not stopping until the late hours of the evening, people got worried, especially Y/N, she wanted her old friend back, not the distant girl Clarisse had become.
ما تفوقي شوية
Days turned into weeks, and Clarisse tried to push her feelings down, to ignore them. But it was hard when every little thing reminded her of Y/N. The way she laughed, the way she tilted her head when she was deep in thought, the way her eyes sparkled when she talked about something she loved.
She's not your girlfriend
It’s a little better now, Clarisse told herself. Y/N had broken up with David, some new guy Y/N liked, but Clarisse had known it would happen eventually, but that didn’t make it easier. Y/N was single now, but Clarisse wasn’t sure if that meant she had a chance.
She likes a boy, she likes a boy And I'm not a boy, I'm not a boy I'm not a boy, I'm not a-
After all, Y/N liked boys, and Clarisse... wasn’t a boy.
She likes a boy, she likes a boy She likes a boy, she likes a boy
She likes a boy, she likes a boy. The words echoed in Clarisse’s mind, a constant reminder of the barrier between them. Clarisse had finally accepted that Y/N didn’t feel the same way. Y/N would never see her the way she wanted to be seen.
And I'm not a boy, I'm not a boy I'm not a boy, I'm not a- I'm not a boy
I’m not a boy. Clarisse repeated the phrase to herself, over and over, like a mantra. It was a painful truth, but it was one she needed to accept. Eventually, she knew she would find someone who felt the same way about her. But for now, she had to let Y/N go.
Y/N eventually moved on, finding someone new, another boy who caught her eye. Clarisse watched from the sidelines, her heart aching, but she kept her distance. She couldn’t keep torturing herself, couldn’t keep hoping for something that would never happen.
Fuck that guy
Fuck that guy, Clarisse thought, with a mix of anger and sadness. But she knew that it wasn’t Y/N’s fault or the boy’s fault. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. Some things just weren’t meant to be.
And as hard as it was, Clarisse knew she had to move on too.
Waiting for you
✿❀ Clarisse La Rue x Reader ✿❀
you find peace in your troubled relationship one night with someone you never thought you would.
considering breaking up with your boyfriend, you go walking one night, to the docks, your safespace, unknowingly someone joins you and helps you diecide what to do.
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As you followed Sam to a nearby sparring area, the tension in the air was palpable. Sam, always observant, glanced at you with a concerned expression, his blue eyes narrowing slightly. "You alright? You keep spacing out?" His voice carried a hint of worry, something unusual for him.
He was typically confident, bordering on cocky, but when it came to you, he seemed genuinely concerned, or he used to. When you had first got together he had been the perfect boyfriend, but as time went on, that title started to slip.
"Yeah, of course. I'm just tired," you replied with a nonchalant shrug, trying to downplay any concern he might have. You didn't want him to think you couldn't handle yourself.
Sam studied you for a moment, his eyes scanning your face as if searching for any sign that you might be hiding something. "Yeah, ok then," he said, finally letting out a small chuckle.
He doesn't care anymore, he’s lost all feeling, he used to ask how i was daily, with genuine care, listening to my every word. The tension in his shoulders eased as he added with a smirk, "Now let’s do this thing.” He says picking up a sword, assuming a fighting stance. His movements were fluid, practised, like someone who had trained for years.
You mirrored his stance, your eyes locked on his, both of you focused and ready. The sparring area was quiet, the only sound being the rustle of leaves in the breeze. The world seemed to fade away as you prepared for the fight.
The first jab was swift, aimed directly at Sam’s chest. He dodged it easily, his movements smooth and calculated, like a predator toying with its prey. "That's the best you can do?" he teased, a smirk tugging at his lips. "You'll have to do better than that to defeat me."
Undeterred, you quickly followed up with a double jab. Sam dodged those as well, his movements becoming more and more effortless. He was clearly enjoying himself, almost toying with you as he kept avoiding your attacks. "Come on, I know you can do better," he said, sounding almost bored as he danced around your sword.
But you had anticipated this. You threw another jab, this time feinting to the left before quickly redirecting your punch to the right. Sam didn't see it coming—he was caught off guard. Your sword connected with his chest, and he staggered backward, his expression momentarily one of surprise.
"Ha!" you exclaimed, feeling a surge of triumph.
Sam quickly recovered, though, a smirk spreading across his face as he steadied himself. "Not bad," he admitted, rubbing his chest where you had hit him. "But I'm just getting warmed up."
You could see the respect in his eyes, though it was laced with the competitive edge that always seemed to drive him. "Come on then," you challenged, your voice low and determined.
Sam stepped closer, his confidence seemingly unshaken by your hit. "You sure you can handle more, tough girl?" he asked, his playful smirk returning as he prepared to attack again.
"Are you sure you can, pretty boy?" you shot back, the nickname slipping out before you could stop yourself.
Sam chuckled, clearly not expecting the cheeky nickname. "Oh, I can handle whatever you throw at me," he said, his eyes glinting with amusement. “Without swords this time.”
The fight continued, with Sam clearly having the upper hand most of the time. He was stronger, more experienced, and his movements were almost too fast to track. But you held your own, landing a few solid hits that made him respect your abilities even more. The two of you moved across the sparring area in a flurry of punches, kicks, and dodges, neither willing to give up.
Finally, the duel came to an end when you tripped over a loose stone, losing your balance and falling backward. Sam, distracted by something in the distance, hadn't noticed at first. Only moving to help when he heard a groan come from you.
“You alright?” He asked offering you a hand to help you up.
"Thanks," you muttered, trying to shake off the pain.
"No problem," Sam replied, a small smile on his face as he dusted himself off. He glanced back behind you, his eyes warm with admiration.
You turn to see what he’s looking at, only to be faced with a group of giggling girls from Hera’s cabin. What a prick.
You scoff, drawing his attention back, “I’ll see you at dinner, i’m gonna go change.”
“Yeah ok, see you later.”
You turned to walk away, but as you did, your eyes caught sight of Clarisse, who had been watching the pair of you spar. Her eyes were sharp, her expression unreadable as she stood in the shadows, partially hidden from view. The moment your eyes met, she quickly looked away, pretending she hadn’t been watching.
But unknown to Y/n the jealousy was clear—Clarisse wasn’t just watching out of curiosity; she was envious that it was Sam fighting you and not her. Sam that close to you. He didn’t deserve you, she knew that, he should know that, the whole camp should know that.
Y/n knew it too, she didnt believe she should be treated like this, she knew Sam had been looking at other girls, he always did, he also didnt care Y/n knew. He only kept her because she was seen as one of the nicest girls at camp, although she belonged to aphrodite, she knew how to wield a sword and boy could she. He stayed with her to make the other girls jealous, jealous taht Y/n had what they all wanted, he liked the attention from the others, and didn’t care anymore whether it hurt Y/n.
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Later that evening, as the sun set and dinner time approached, the camp was bathed in a warm, golden glow. The smell of food wafted through the air, making everyone’s stomachs rumble in anticipation. You sat at the Apollo table as usual, with Sam beside you, his presence once comforting and familiar, now strange and unkown.
From across the dining pavilion, Clarisse sat at the Ares table, her eyes fixed on you and Sam. There was a tightness to her expression, her jaw clenched as she watched the two of you together. The jealousy she felt was almost palpable, a bitter feeling that twisted in her chest. She hated that Sam had you, the one thing she wanted but couldn’t have.
You were in the middle of laughing at something Sam had said when you felt eyes on you. Glancing up, you met Clarisse’s gaze from across the pavilion. This time, neither of you looked away. Instead, you offered her a small, almost knowing smile before turning back to your conversation with Sam. Clarisse’s heart twisted at the gesture, a spark of hope flickering inside her despite her best efforts to suppress it.
But reality quickly set in, and Clarisse looked away, focusing on her own meal. She tried to ignore the way her heart ached every time she saw you with Sam, laughing and smiling like you didn’t have a care in the world. It was like a dagger to her heart, reminding her of what she could never have.
She knew you were happy with Sam, but that smile... it seemed to say more than just a polite acknowledgment. It was like a tiny crack in the wall she’d built around her feelings, allowing a sliver of light to break through.
Throughout the rest of dinner, Clarisse found herself stealing glances at you, watching the way you interacted with Sam. Each time you laughed or smiled at something he said, it felt like a small dagger twisting in her chest. She couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to be the one sitting beside you, sharing those moments.
As dinner drew to a close, Clarisse couldn’t bear to watch any longer. She pushed her plate away and stood up, making her way out of the dining pavilion with a heavy heart. She couldn’t bring herself to watch the two of you any longer. The sight of your happiness only served to remind her of what she couldn’t have.
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Instead of going straight to bed, Clarisse decided to take a walk around the camp, hoping the cool night air would help clear her head. She wandered past the various cabins, each one holding memories that only served to remind her of you and Sam. The pain in her chest grew with every step she took, but she kept walking, hoping that the motion would help her forget, even if just for a little while.
Unbeknown to Clarisse, you had the same idea. After Sam had walked you back to your cabin and kissed your cheek goodnight, he had stopped kissing you on the lips sometime ago, it was just normal for him to not show affection anymore, you had gone to your room, and waited. When you were sure everyone else was asleep, you quietly climbed out of your window and made your way to the docks. It was a place you often went to when you needed to clear your head—a place that held special meaning for you.
And that’s where Clarisse found you, standing at the edge of the dock, staring out at the water as it rippled under the moonlight. She hesitated, unsure if she should approach or just leave you to your thoughts. But something compelled her to move forward, her feet carrying her towards you before she could stop herself.
You didn’t notice her at first, too lost in your own thoughts to hear her quiet footsteps on the wooden planks. It wasn’t until she was standing just a few feet away that you realized you weren’t alone. You turned, surprised to see Clarisse there, her expression unreadable in the dim light.
"Hey," she said softly, not wanting to startle you.
Clarisse’s heart pounded in her chest as she looked at you, sitting there in the moonlight, your face illuminated by the soft glow. She wanted to say something else, anything, but the words wouldn’t come. Instead, she just stood there, her emotions warring inside her as she tried to figure out what to do.
You noticed the conflict in her eyes, the way she seemed to be struggling with something. "Hi, you okay?" you asked gently, your concern genuine. You had never seen her out after curfew before.
Clarisse nodded, though she didn’t trust her voice to speak just yet. Instead, she took a deep breath and walked up to you, stopping when she was close enough to reach out and touch you if she wanted to.
"I’m fine," she finally said, her voice steady but low. "Just needed some air."
You nodded in understanding, your eyes searching hers for any hint of what she might be feeling. "Me too," you admitted.
“Do you mind if I join you?” She asked, her words coming back to her. You nodded scotting over on the dock so she could sit next to you.
For a moment, the two of you just sat there in silence, the only sound being the gentle lapping of the water against the dock. The tension between you was thick, but it wasn’t the kind of tension that came from anger or dislike. It was something deeper, something unspoken that neither of you quite knew how to address.
"I didn’t think I’d find anyone else out here this late," Clarisse admitted, breaking the comfortable silence that had settled between you. "I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to take a walk, and well... I ended up here."
"This is where I come when I need to think," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. "No one ever checks here, so I’m never caught."
Clarisse nodded in understanding. "It’s peaceful here," she agreed. "A good place to clear your head."
"Yeah," you murmured, your gaze drifting over the dark water. "I’ve always felt at peace near the sea. Even when I was younger..."
Clarisse noticed the way your voice trailed off, and she couldn’t help but feel a surge of curiosity. You rarely talked about your past, and she knew you never talked about your past, not with anyone but Sam.
Clarisse looked at you, her expression softening with curiosity and empathy. "You used to spend a lot of time by the sea?"
You hesitated, then nodded. "Yeah, where I lived… if I snuck out my window, it was just a few minutes’ walk to the beach. I used to go there at night, to escape."
Clarisse listened intently, sensing the weight of the memories behind your words. She could tell that talking about this wasn’t easy for you, but she appreciated that you were sharing something so personal. "It sounds like the beach was your refuge."
"It was," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. You paused, considering whether to share more, but the words seemed to catch in your throat. The closeness of Clarisse, the way she was looking at you—it was overwhelming. Your fists clenched in your lap, fingernails digging into your palms as you tried to steady yourself.
Clarisse noticed the tension in your body, the way you seemed to be wrestling with your emotions. Without thinking, she reached out, her hand hovering just above yours. She hesitated, then lightly placed her hand on yours, a gentle touch meant to offer comfort.
The contact startled you, and your head snapped up to meet her gaze. The intensity in Clarisse’s eyes surprised you, but it wasn’t unwelcome. There was something raw and vulnerable in the way she was looking at you, a side of her you hadn’t seen before.
For a moment, the world around you seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you sitting together on that dock, connected by something deeper than words.
She took a step closer, her concern palpable. "What happened?" she asked softly, her tone gentle and encouraging. "You can tell me if you want to."
You hesitated, your mind racing as you struggled to articulate your thoughts. Being vulnerable was not something you were used to, especially not with someone you were still getting to know. The proximity between you and Clarisse suddenly felt overwhelming. You started to fidget, digging your fingernails into your palms, the crescent-shaped marks a testament to your anxiety.
Clarisse noticed your discomfort and the physical signs of your unease. Her heart ached for you, sensing your internal struggle. She reached out a tentative hand, placing it gently on your clenched fist, trying to offer some comfort.
"Hey... it's alright," she said soothingly. "You don't have to say anything you don't want to. I won't judge you, I promise."
Grateful for her understanding, you managed a weak smile. "Thank you. What about you? Why are you out here?"
Clarisse offered a soft smile in response, appreciating your attempt to shift the focus. "I couldn’t sleep either," she admitted with a slight shrug. "Just had a lot on my mind and couldn’t turn my brain off. Thought a walk might clear my head. And, well, here I am."
You noticed how her voice softened as she spoke, and you moved a bit closer, intrigued. "What’s on your mind?" you asked gently.
Clarisse felt her heartbeat quicken as you inched closer. The space between you seemed to shrink, and she could feel the warmth of your body. "Oh, you know, just the usual things," she replied, attempting to sound casual despite the growing tension. "Camp duties, the ever-present threat of monster attacks, you know, the usual."
You glanced at her, noticing her attempt to mask her true feelings. "Oh, right," you said, but the vague response didn’t sit well with you.
Clarisse noticed the skeptical look on your face. "What? What is it?" she asked, a hint of teasing in her voice. "You don’t believe me?"
You shook your head, slightly amused. "No, it’s just surprising. I’ve never seen you out here before."
Clarisse raised an eyebrow, a playful smirk forming on her lips. "Oh, so you’ve claimed this dock as your secret spot?" she teased. "I guess I just have a knack for being stealthy."
She chuckled, clearly enjoying the light-hearted banter. "Well, I hate to break it to you, but I guess we both have the same secret spot tonight. Looks like we’ll have to share."
The two of you sat in a comfortable silence, the soothing sounds of the water lapping against the dock and the rustling of leaves creating a serene backdrop. Clarisse glanced at you, taking in the soft glow of the moonlight on your face. She couldn't deny the attraction she felt, even though she knew you were with Sam.
Her mind raced with conflicting emotions—excitement, guilt, and uncertainty. The cool night air made her shiver, and without thinking, she moved closer to you, seeking warmth and comfort. The proximity between you was intoxicating, and she tried to push aside her fears and doubts.
"I think I’m going to break up with Sam," you blurted out after a long silence, breaking the spell.
Clarisse's heart skipped a beat at your unexpected confession. She quickly masked her surprise, wanting to keep her emotions in check. "Oh, really?" she asked, striving for a neutral tone. "Why’s that?"
You sighed, frustration evident in your voice. "He’s not a nice person. He talks about other girls in front of me, ignores me when I try to have a serious conversation, and gets annoyed when I talk to another guy. Maybe it’s just me. Maybe I don’t deserve to be with him, or maybe I’m just terrible for not giving him another chance."
As you spoke, Clarisse's heart ached for you. She silently cursed Sam, feeling a surge of anger on your behalf. "You deserve so much better than that, Y/n," she said softly, her tone sincere. "You’re not horrible. You’re not the problem."
She wanted to comfort you, to hold you and make everything better, but she restrained herself, not wanting to overstep. "You deserve someone who is kind, who values you, and who treats you with respect," she continued. "Someone who doesn’t ignore you or dismiss your feelings. You deserve someone who loves you for who you are, flaws and all."
You nodded, a touch of sadness in your eyes. "I really thought Sam was the one. He was so different when we started dating. I thought no other guy here was like him, but now I realize that maybe no guy at camp is right for me. I’ll just wait until I leave camp, I guess."
Clarisse’s heart ached for you once more. She understood the pain of being let down by someone you thought was perfect. "It’s okay to feel that way," she said gently. "Sometimes people change, or we don’t see their true colors until later. Love can surprise you when you least expect it."
"Really?" you asked, your voice filled with a hint of hope.
Clarisse nodded, her smile warm and reassuring. "Really. You never know when you’ll meet that special someone."
As you continued to talk, you both unconsciously drew closer to each other. The space between you dwindled, and Clarisse could feel the heat radiating from your body. It was exhilarating and nerve-wracking at the same time.
You hesitated before mentioning, "Yeah, maybe I’m just done looking for guys in general."
Clarisse’s heart skipped a beat, and she couldn’t hide the flicker of hope in her eyes. "Oh?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. "You’re done looking for guys?"
She tried to keep her tone casual, but the underlying excitement was hard to conceal. Her palms felt sweaty, and her mind raced with thoughts of what this might mean.
You shrugged slightly. "Yeah, they’ve all been the same." You hesitated before adding, "or maybe I’ll just have to find a girl."
Clarisse’s heartbeat quickened, her pulse racing with a mixture of excitement and anxiety. "A girl, huh?" she said, her tone light but filled with a new intensity. "You’d consider that?"
You nodded, your gaze meeting hers with a mix of uncertainty and hope. "Well, the guys here have let me down, so maybe I will."
Clarisse’s pulse raced at your words. "Yeah, guys can be pretty disappointing," she echoed, her tone now carrying a deeper meaning. "But girls… girls can be different. They often have a unique way of connecting and understanding."
"Have you been with a girl before?" you asked, your curiosity evident.
Clarisse’s heart skipped a beat at your question. The conversation had taken a more intimate turn, and she struggled to find the right words. "Me? With a girl?" she repeated, her voice soft. "Yeah, actually. I have."
"Really? What’s it like?" you asked, genuinely interested.
Clarisse took a deep breath, trying to articulate her thoughts. "It’s different," she began, her voice barely above a whisper. "There’s a tenderness and vulnerability that’s unique. It’s like a new way of experiencing intimacy, where you’re both giving and receiving at the same time."
As she spoke, Clarisse reached out, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. The touch was tender and intimate, and she couldn’t help but notice the blush that spread across your cheeks.
"You’re blushing," Clarisse observed softly.
"I’m just cold," you said with a smile, though the lie was obvious.
Clarisse chuckled, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "Cold, huh? Your cheeks are as red as a ripe tomato."
You looked away, flustered. "I don’t know what you’re insinuating, but I don’t like it."
Clarisse’s teasing tone softened. "Oh, come on, don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m suggesting. Your blush gives you away."
She laughed gently, her heart pounding with anticipation. "Well, if it’s true, it means you’re either embarrassed or attracted to me."
The words slipped out before she could stop them. She hadn’t meant to be so blunt, but she couldn’t deny the excitement building inside her.
"What if it was the second one?" you asked, your voice filled with a hint of vulnerability.
"If it was the second one," Clarisse said, her voice dropping to a husky whisper, "I would be very, very happy."
She took a step closer, their bodies almost touching, her heart racing. "Really?" you asked, your voice trembling with a mix of hope and nervousness.
"Really," Clarisse affirmed, her eyes locked with yours. "I’ve had a bit of a crush on you for a while now. And if you were attracted to me too…"
Clarisse’s admission hung in the air, a mix of excitement and nervousness palpable in her gaze. She took a deep breath, feeling exposed but relieved to share her feelings.
As you leaned in to kiss her, Clarisse’s heart raced. She had not expected you to be so bold, and her emotions were a whirlwind. Before she could second-guess herself, she met you halfway, their lips gently touching.
The kiss started soft and tentative but quickly grew more intense. Clarisse’s hand found its way to the back of your head, pulling you closer as she deepened the kiss. The world around them faded, replaced by the sensations of their connection—soft sighs, gasps, and the mingling warmth of their bodies.
As their kiss deepened, Clarisse’s fingers tangled in your hair, and she explored your body with a growing sense of urgency.
Despite the passion between you, you pulled away, a hint of hesitation in your voice. "We can’t… not until I’ve broken up with Sam."
Clarisse took a deep breath, her heart sinking at the reminder. "You’re right," she said softly, her voice tinged with disappointment. "We can’t until you’ve ended things with Sam."
She reached out, cupping your cheek gently, her thumb tracing the line of your jaw. "But I want you to know that I’ll be here for you, no matter what. When you’re ready, we’ll figure this all out together, okay?"
Clarisse offered a reassuring smile, giving your cheek a tender caress before letting her hand fall back to her side. "Good," she said gently. "Take all the time you need. I’ll be here, waiting for you." As she always did, wait.